My Grandfather really liked Fall Out Boy

I never understood why, considering the age gap between him and the band. Every week, I’d go sit with him on his porch and we’d listen to the band, jamming out to some sick tunes and laughing our hearts out at each other’s awful singing. Unfortunately as time passed, he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’...

As the plumber left my house I saw something fall out of his back packet. I walked over and saw that it was a bag of drugs.

But I didn’t bend down to get it, because I didn’t want plumber’s crack.

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree?

Because it was dead.

An apple and an emo kid fall out of a tree which one hits the ground first?

The apple, the rope caught the emo kid.

Why do scuba divers fall out of the boat backwards?

Well, if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.

Why did the first koala fall out the tree

It was dead

Why did the second koala fall out the tree?

It got hit by the first koala

Why did the third koala fall out the tree?

Thought it was a race to the bottom

Why did the fourth koala fall out of the tree?

Peer pressure

Why did the kangaroo die...

What’s black and white that could fall out of a tree and kill you?

A piano

A girl had her bag open and a calculator fell out. I picked it up and said “excuse me , I think this is yours. I saw it fall out of your bag”

“that adds up” she said

What does a child get when they fall out of a tree?

PTS-Tree

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

It was dead.

Why did the second monkey fall out the tree?

It was stapled to the first monkey.

Why did the fridge fall out the tree?

It’s a fridge. It can’t hold on.

Why did the little boy fall off his bike?

He got hit by two monkeys and a fridge.

I know a guy who survived an 8000-foot fall out of a plane.

Until he hit the ground.

As a group of soldiers stood in formation at an Army Base,the Drill Seargent says,"All right,all of you idiots fall out."

As the rest of the squad wandered away,one soldier remained at attention.The Drill Seargeant walked over to him until he was eye to eye with him,and then raised an eyebrow.The soldier smiled and said,"Sure was a lot of 'em,huh,Sir?"

Why did the pirates fall out?

They couldn’t see aye to aye

My brother when he was 5 told me the following joke: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

Now, he said the following with a pretty serious and sad look on his face: Because he was dead.

How to fall out of love with an ex-girlfriend?

Set her voice as your alarm-clock ringtone.

My buddy asked me if we’d fall out if the plane door opened.

‘Nah, we’ll still be friends’, I replied.

A Galaxy Phone, an iPhone and a windows phone fall out a top story window.

The galaxy phone bounces with minor cracks.

The iPhone smashes into dozens of pieces.

The windows phone freezes mid decent.

How do you make a guy with one arm fall out of a tree?

Wave

What scientific principle is demonstrated when cookies fall out of the cupboard?

Fig Newton's law.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree?

It died.

Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? - It was tied to the first koala.

Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? - It thought it was a game.

Why did the man cycling through the bush fall off his bike? - He was hit by three koalas.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

...because it was dead

Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree...because it was tied to the first monkey.

Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree...because it succumbed to peer pressure.

Why did the little boy fall off of the swing...because he was hit by the 3 fall...

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