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Fallout Jokes

Fallout 3: "Where's my father?" Fallout 4: "Where's my son?"

Fallout 76: "Where's my refund?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cockroaches can survive a nuclear fallout but dies when you swat them with a newspaper...

Shows how toxic our media is...

In fallout, why are caps used as currency?

Because america is a CAPitalist country.

(fallout joke) Why do synths fart so fast?

-they were made by the insta-toot! (institute)

(i made my GF laugh she just started playing it)

Predictions of the relationship fallout of quarantine:

In one month divorce rates will spike.
In 9 months birth rates will spike.
In 13 years and nine months we will have quaranteens.

I think Fallout was ahead of its time

The Resource Wars started in 2003 and the New Plague started in 2019

If i had a penny for every time a Ukrainian man saved the world from eventual nuclear fallout

If i had a penny for every time a Ukrainian man saved the world from eventual nuclear fallout due to Russian stupidity, I'd have 2 pennies; it's not a lot but it's weird that it happened twice

What does Fallout 76 and gold plated velcro have in common?

They’re both $70 rip off’s

I had a good Fallout 4 pun in mind...

but I forgot it Radaway...

What do you do in case of fallout?

Put it back and take shorter strokes

My girlfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much...

What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.

Why did Jada not face any consequences in the fallout of the Slap incident at the Oscars?

Because fortune favors the bald.

One of my favorites from Fallout 3:

I once visited a crematorium that gave discounts to burn victims.

Fallout 76

... why did you clicked the title? That was the joke...

So I was playing one of the old fallout games

I think it's rad

Brexit fallout: my French Toast has just surrendered to my English Muffins. Germany is sending in the Luftwaffle... these events could engulf the entire continental breakfast.

and my Irish coffee is drunk. Again.

I saw Mission Impossible: Fallout yesterday.

It's probably the longest iPhone commercial I'll ever watch.

How do robots eat in the Fallout Universe?

Photosynthesis

What do you call the fallout from an Israeli nuke?

Zionizing radiation.

The Fallout games are the most unrealistic games I've ever played.

I mean, how is there no Skyrim remastered for the Pip-Boy?

5/7 unplayable.

It's good that Fallout 76 is introducing more and more things to get less players.

Fallout is meant to have a post-apocalyptic setting so having less people around makes you feel like you're playing it for real.

Be careful if you use the Bethesda duffel bag.

Your stuff might fallout.

My Friend and I were exploring the Appalachia on Fallout 76

Well, that was until I shot him in the head with my pistol.

Now, to be fair, I did have an airtight alibi for this.

I Didn't Know the Gun Was Loaded.

Did you hear about Fallout Boy's newest headwear?

Yeah, now their selling Uma Turbans

FALLOUT 5 RELEASED TODAY

No need for the VR, updates will come these next weeks provided by trump

Why shouldn't you wear a bra that was made in Chernobyl?

Fallout

What is the favourite game of balding people?

Fallout.

Don’t buy Ukrainian boxer shorts...

...Chernobyl fallout.





(*has to be read in a British accent*)

Don't buy Ukrainian underpants

Chernobyl fallout

Speaking from experience, don’t argue with close friends about Bethesda Games.

It’s a terrible reason to fallout for.

Did you hear about the two atomic bombs that got into an argument?

They had a fallout.

My worst joke ever told

What do you call the fallout of a cheese nuke? Debrie.

A photon checks into a hotel

The bell hop asks if they have any luggage.

The photon replies "No, I'm travelling light".

- Codsworth (Fallout 4)

Girlfriend: "We're breaking up."

Boyfriend: "Why?"

Girlfriend: "You're always playing video games."

Boyfriend: "This is a stupid thing to *Fallout 4*."


All Credit goes to my friend

At first I wanted to break up with my girlfriend because she didn’t like to play video games...

It wasn’t really something to Fallout 4.

If you are a man, don't visit nuclear disaster zones.

Because chernobyl fallout.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Girl: I am breaking up with u

Me: Wait, why?
Girl: Because all u fucking talk about are video games
Me: Babe Please.
Me: This is such a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
Girl: Bye.

Why do you need to keep your flies zipped up in the Ukraine?

Because Chernobyl fallout.

I am amazed with Bethesta's new game.

I have never seen anyone Fallout this hard with their audience.

If Kim Jong-Un like nukes so much...

Isn’t he just Fallout Boy?

EA just acquired a new video game license...

Fallout

Why do you always close your zipper when visiting Ukraine?

Cause Chernobyl fallout.

Why should you never wear Ukranian underwear?

Chernobyl Fallout.





An elderly friend told me this joke, just thought I'd traumatise people with it too.

TIL of an odd political problem in Colorado.

Cattle has long been the number one agricultural product of Colorado, but the recent legalization of marijuana is causing significant and unforeseen problems.

Apparently, cows love marijuana as much as people, and cattle ranches and nearby marijuana farms are on the brink of open warfare. Co...

Bethesda released a working title of their newest installment in flagship series-

Fallout: Roseanne.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Greatest Insult To Hicks / West Virginians

You're so imbred your family tree looks like a Ferris Wheel!

Thought about this watching the Fallout 76 trailer, and then realizing that radiation isn't even needed to create mutants there.

To all the "I'm moving to Canada" people out there, you're being ridiculous.

You won't be far enough to escape the nuclear fallout. Shoot for New Zealand or Australia.

i had to break up with my girlfriends because i was making references to Bethesda games

what a strange thing to fallout for

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