UPJOKE
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Why is the deep south US the safest place to relocate during the zombie apocalypse?

Toothless zombies can't bite.

Why did the potter relocate in the middle of the night?

Because he didn't want to have a public bowl movement!

I was instructed to relocate all these boxes of letterhead. But I can't...

They're stationary.

Today my company relocated me to their Spain office.

But it’s ok, because nobody expects the Spanish acquisition.

Shoutout to the ex-mobster who, through witness protection, was relocated in a house under the sea.

Rest easy, you’re sleeping with the fishes now.

I think the Area 51 raid is just stupid.

How do we not know the government won't just relocate them aliens before the 20th?

A blonde is on her way to Michigan...(Medium joke)

The flight attendant notices her sitting in first class sit, to which she doesn't belong. She asks the blonde to please move to her seat in economy. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I deserve to sit where I want!"
The flight attendent goes to the co pilot and asks him to reloca...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three Guys Die and Get to go to Heaven (long)

So they're waiting for God to get to and judge/reward them. God finishes with others and gets to them. Standing before them, he says, "Alright. You three get to go to heaven. Here's what's gonna happen. You think carefully and tell me what you would really love for the rest of eternity. I will set a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tribute to the holiday season

Up until a few years ago, I would frequent a local chess club for shits and giggles. I wasn't very good at chess, but most of the people there were very into the game, knew all of the big names, went to a lot of big events, and some of them even got prize money from time to time.

Shortly befo...

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