This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The world's press gathers...

...at a press conference announced by the team at CERN in Geneva. The CERN spokeswoman steps up to the speaking podium and smiles broadly at the assembled reporters, microphones and cameras. She begins to speak.

“Thank you all for joining us today. We have some major announcements to make...

I heard the White House Correspondents Association is going to give equal time to a conservative comedian at next year's dinner

I hope a year is long enough to find one.

Visiting Afghanistan for a second time, a war correspondent noted that since the fall of the Taliban, wives who used to walk ten paces behind their husbands were now walking ten paces in front.

The journalist asked one of men if this was a sign of growing equality.
"No" the man replied. "Landmines."

People need to be a little bit more considerate of Trump's decision to skip the White House Correspondents' dinner.

The roasting waiting for him there would probably have made him the second black president.

SNL should parody CNN by having Tina Fey be a news correspondent delivering headlines from a canoe.

They call the segment "Fey Canoes."

BREAKING NEWS: Just in from a correspondent in the Middle East.

ISIS to buy all Samsung Galaxy Note 7. #note7

What do Monica Lewinsky and an Asian political correspondent have in common?

All they talk about is the presidential erection

What is the difference between the regular police and the secret service?

The secret service is the only police that gets in trouble if a black person dies.

Shamelessly stolen from the correspondents' dinner.

The White House Correspondents' Dinner is ...

just a big political party.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

War jokes

A young, freshly minted lieutenant was sent to Bosnia as part
of the peace keeping mission. During a briefing on land mines,
the captain asked for questions.

Our intrepid solder raised his hand and asked, "If we do happen
to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?"

"N...

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