What's the difference between a wife, a nymphomaniac, and a hooker?
The nympho says, "You're done already?" The hooker says, "Are you done yet?" And the wife says, "Beige, I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."
A Saudi Prince wants to buy a bull, so he goes to see a famous Russian bovine breeder.
The Russian tells him "I have many good animal. Here is Swedish bull, is born black color, but color turns white when grows.”
"Over there is American bull. Color when born is red, but become dark brown when full grown.”
"And here, Turkish bull. They is born dark brown, but grow up to b...
My son can only see in shades of beige,
Doctors have diagnosed him with colour-blandness.
I before e
Except for when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters.
A couple called in a contractor to do some updates to their house and landscape.
A couple called in a contractor to do some updates to their house and landscape. They all walk in to the bedroom and they tell him they were thinking about painting it blue because there's a baby boy on the way. He walks to the window and yells "Green side up!" The couple look at one another a bit c...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Why People Hate School Re-Unions
Jan, Sue and Mary haven't seen each other since leaving school.
They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar.
Jan arrives first, wearing a beige Versace. She orders a bottle of Pinot Grigio.
Sue arrives shortly afterward, in grey ...
I want to repaint my room a shade of white...
...but I can't decide between "eggshell", "beige", or "2016 Oscars".
Bob always wears the same pants
He wears them to work, he wears them at home, and he wears them outside.
I, being someone who likes to mix things up, try to discourage him from this.
The same beige pants every day. Really starts to put a strain on your eyes.
So I asked him why he wears them, and he responds th...
What's the difference between a lover, a hooker, and a wife after twenty years of marriage?
Your lover says "Oooh, more, deeper, longer!" Your hooker says "Cmon, cmon, let's get this over with!" Your wife says "Beige! Beige! I'm going to paint the ceiling beige."
An albino guy walks into a tattoo parlor...
...the tattooist looks him over, and asks "So... what do you want?"
The albino guy replies, "BEIGE. EVERYWHERE."
A sufficiently advanced society has synthesized all human knowledge
in pill form. So an undergraduate goes to the drug store and asks the pharmacist if he has history, economics, and literature. The pharmacist disappears into the back. When he returns, he has three little boxes and says
"Here, take this purple one for all of human history—from the origins all...