Be Eat Jokes - 11 Hilarious Be Eat Jokes

On a serious note, if anybody knows of any lonely people who will be eating Christmas dinner alone because they have no family or close friends, can the let me know?

I need to borrow some chairs

Maybe we shouldn’t be eating those little flat breads during communion

... since they haven’t risen yet.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told my wife "When the apocalypse comes, I'll be eating human flesh to survive".

"You shitting me?!" She asked.

"i might be" I replied.

I won't be eating at my favorite Italian restaurant any more. They have a new chef named Sal.

Sal Monella.

Ash Wednesday was yesterday so my family is going to be eating a lot more legumes

Mostly lentils

"Now you'll be eating for two," said the doctor. "Am I pregnant?" she asked with a smile.

"No, it's cancer."

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Early one morning a fat kid was sitting in an airport terminal eating a giant size candy bar.

An older man strolled by and saw the boy.

He stopped abruptly and asked "Hey kid, do you think it's a good idea to be eating a giant candy bar for breakfast?"

The boy replied "I don't know, but my grandpappy lived to be 102 years old."

The old man said "I'm sure he did, but he ...

If video games were really bad for you, then the entire Pac-man generation would be eating pills and running away from their problems

Oh wait.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and an American get captured by a tribe of cannibals

The leader of the cannibals arrives, and says "Greetings, travelers. I'm sorry to tell you this, but since we have captured you, you must die. Furthermore, we must eat you, and make canoes out of your skins, in accordance with our traditions. However, we will be as humane as we can. We will allow yo...

Mind your business....

A young kid was eating candy and older guy says , you shouldn't be eating candy, kid says my grandpa lived to be 105 years old.... guy says did he eat candy every day ... kid says no ..... he minded his own f'n business.

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A little boy and an old man are sitting on a park bench...

...The little boy unwraps a candy bar and eats it. Then he eats a second one. And a third, fourth and fifth.

The old man, watching this, says "You shouldn't be eating so many candy bars. You will ruin your teeth and get fat."

The little boy responded, "My Grandfather lived to be 10...

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