Astrologists are said to be poor interpreters...

but they always find something, if it's any constellation.

I wish I could be poor one day

I am tired of being poor everyday

Steal a man's wallet a day, he will be poor...

...for that day. Return it the next day with a poked hole in the condom from his wallet and he'll be poor for the rest of his life.

I used to be poor. Then I started singing on streets for donations.

Now I get donations to not sing on streets

[Motivation] Just because you were born in poverty, it doesn't mean that you'll be poor forever.

I was born in a hospital, yet I'm not a doctor.

If I got a dollar for every 2020 vision joke I‘ve read today, I’d still be poor.

I don‘t sort by new.

I used to be poor. Then I bought a thesaurus.

Now I'm impecunious.

My grammar may be poor, but my grilling is impeccable.

I'd steak my reputation on that.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two boys in Egypt free a crocodile

In a small village in Egypt lived two orphan boys, Set and Amenhotep. They always watched out for each other, well past their years of childhood and into their time as young adults.

One day, the two were walking outside the village when they saw a crocodile trapped in a poacher’s snare. The...

Apparently there are two rules to win in life...

1. Never be poor.
2. Never be ugly.

Well, the joke's on me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day.

He inquired, 'Where have you been?'
God smiled deeply and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, 'Look, Michael. Look what I've made.'
Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and said, 'What is it?'
'It's a planet,' replied God, 'and I've put Life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's...

2 of my friends were arguing about who's house was the most expensive....

"Well, my house is worth 8 million dollars!" One of them said "Ha! Mine is worth 11 million!" The other said so I chimed in "You guys must be poor, my roof in itself is worth 200 million!"

Puzzled, they both asked me "Woah! Where do you even live? How can you afford all that?!" When I told th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In honor of Charles Dickens...

I am also going to be poor this Christmas

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If I had a dollar for every time the economy inflated...

I'd have an infinite amount of money, but i'll still be poor as fuck.

A man goes to a psychic

“What’s my fortune?” he asks

“You will be poor and miserable until you’re 35. Then you won’t be miserable.” replies the psychic

“What happens at 35?”

“You get used to it.”

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