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Alcoholics Anonymous Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Alcoholics Anonymous meeting takes place. The presenter completes a demonstration.

He brings out two glasses, a bottle of whiskey, a bottle of water and an earthworm. He pours one glass with water and the other with whiskey. He then drops the worm into the bottle of water, where it wriggles around for a little while, but is ok.

He then picks it up and drops it into the whi...

Why is it called Alcoholics ANONYMOUS

when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Peter and I am an alcoholic!

How many members of Alcoholics Anonymous does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has to want to change.

Hi, my name is Bob, and I’m an alcoholic

“Sir, this is Triple A, not Alcoholics Anonymous”

“I know, I’m just trying to explain why my car is in a lake.”

I just joined alcoholics anonymous

I still drink, just use a different name

I would go to alcoholics anonymous

But everyone already knows

Why shouldn't you join Alcoholics Anonymous on Thanksgiving?

Because all they serve is cold turkey.

I’m addicted to plagiarism…

So I’m starting a help group called Alcoholics Anonymous.

Ever since I was a kid I wanted to be good enough at skating, biking, surfing, or running to be chosen to represent a brand like Nike, Red Bull, or Under Armour. Recently the pandemic has allowed me to double down on recreation and hone my craft, and I finally got a sponsor.

Thanks Alcoholics Anonymous!

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