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Emails Jokes

They should build the wall with Hillary's emails

Because nobody can get over them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hillary's emails would make the perfect construction material for building the great Trump Wall...

Since no one can get the fuck over them.

What does the Trump administration use instead of emails?

Alternative fax.

I was reading my emails...

The other day I was reading my emails and there was one from my boss, it said;

"Mr. Morgan I regret to inform you that although I thought this company could tolerate your ADD, I'm afraid you're just not productive enough. You may turn up Wednesday to collect your things. I sincerely hope you ...

All these people getting emails from the Prince of Nigeria, I got one from an Egyptian Pharaoh...

But it turned out to just be a pyramid scheme.

An Arab student emails his dad:

*An Arab student emails his dad:*

Dear Dad,

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here,
but Dad, I am a bit ashamed to arrive at my college with my pure-gold Ferrari when all my teachers and many fellow students travel by train.

Your son, Nasser.

...

A young lady from my office just sent me an email

saying "ithinktherearesomeproblemswithmykeyboardcanyoupleasegivemeanalternative"

Oh boy am I excited, but what does "ternative" mean?

How do people from the South respond to emails?

Reply Y’all!

Be careful about emails from weird addresses with long links or strange files attached

They could be from your parents

Check your emails more often

Turns out my DNA ancestry results came back 100% Nigerian and I’ve been neglecting my royal prince cousin for years

I asked a monk if they were allowed to send emails

He said yes as long as there are no attachments

“Can you please stop sending me Spam emails?”

“I’m a vegetarian.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I keep getting emails about penis enlargement.

The ones from my wife are starting to get personal, but it's the ones from my mother that really hurt.

What does Hillary's emails and a racist post have in common?

[removed]

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old email-chain joke: The firefighter and the little girl.

Found this one while going through old emails from my mom, circa 2006...



A fire fighter is working on the engine outside the station when he notices a little girl next door in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The...

2 Trump Supporters go to heaven

St. Peter greets them at the Pearly gates and asks if there is anything in the universe they'd like to know before meeting God. The fist guy asks, "What was really in Hillary's emails?"
"Nothing incriminating really", replies St. Peter.
The other guy turns and whispers, "Wow, this goes highe...

What's the most embarrassing part about Hillary Clinton's emails?

The Nigerian Prince actually came through with the money transfer.

A monk was checking his emails.

A woman saw this and looked at him weirdly,
Soon she approached him and asked
"is it okay for monks to use emails?"
The monk said "Ofcourse its okay for Monks to use Emails,
As long as there are no attachments"

The fence builder hates getting emails about his materials.

He's tired of seeing Re: Posts

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Conference calls are like emails

So just send a FUCKING EMAIL

You shouldn’t take a lawyer’s advice over emails

Because that would be...





E-legal.

Who is the patron saint of emails?

St Francis of a CC

Hillary's emails finally lead to an arrest.

Roger Stone was arrested for his communications with the Trump campaign regarding Wikileaks and Hillary Clinton’s emails.

What does the Trump administration use instead of emails?

Alternative fax.

Can't rely on emails!

A man goes away on business. He emails his wife from the road and says he’ll be home that night because the trip wrapped up earlier than expected. When he gets home, he walks into the bedroom to find his wife in bed with another man. Without a word, the husband leaves the room and goes down to the l...

URGENT: Do not open any emails from Hormel Foods

It might be SPAM!

I get a lot of emails from a guy named Don O'Treply.

I wonder why he never seems to get my replies?

How To Translate Work Emails

I have a question. = I have 18 questions.

I’ll look into it. = I’ve already forgotten about it.

I tried my best. = I did the bare minimum.

Happy to discuss further. = Don’t ask me about this again.

No worries. = You really messed up...

Joke Of The Month

A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer
in his room, so he decided to send an email to his
wife. He accidentally typed the wrong email
address, and without realising he sent the email to
a widow who had just returned from her
husband's funeral. The widow decided to check
h...

How do you get your husband to stop looking at your emails

You rename it instructions

Check eMail Address Before Sending

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 35 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel plans. So, the husband left Minneapolis an...

It's hard to be a Buddhist in todays digital world, especially when it comes to emails.

No attachments.

I know all the subjects of Hillary Clinton's emails, ask me anything

[Deleted]

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