Alcohol Consumption Jokes - 6 Hilarious Alcohol Consumption Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I read that heavy alcohol consumption causes severe liver damage. That scared the crap out of me.

So I've given up reading completely.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Good way to reduce alcohol consumption

William Sexfear's one good way to reduce alcohol consumption..

Before marriage- Drink whenever you are sad.

After marriage- Drink whenever you are happy.

When I graduated high school, my parents enrolled me in medical research

It was a 4-year study of sleep deprivation and alcohol consumption.

Sure, they called it "college", but I knew otherwise.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy moves to rural Idaho...

The day he finally gets all moved in, he decides to go down the road to meet his neighbor. The man knocks on the door and when the neighbor opens it, the man says, "Hey, I just moved in down the way and I thought I'd come and meet my nearest neighbor".

"Well great!" says the neighbor, "You c...

A guy visits his clock loving friend.

There are clocks everywhere. Each one of them shows different times. But some go faster than the others.

"What's with the clocks?" he asks.

"Each country has its own clock here. The higher alcohol consumption, the faster the clock."

He was right - the Korean clock for example wa...

In 1952 the New York Philharmonic was on a national tour...

...and on their way home from the west coast when their flight was grounded in Kansas due to bad weather.

It had been a long tour and tensions had been running high. A first violin player was a wreck from excessive alcohol consumption, the trumpet section engaged in much infighting due to com...

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