I Identify as Italy in the 1600’s

Baroque

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Murder at 1600

A man calls home to tell his wife that he’ll be late because he will be in a meeting until late.

Ring ring..

Maid: Hello

Man: Hello this is John, can you please ask your Madam to talk to me right now?

Maid: uh Sir, unfortunately she can’t right now. Can i ask her to call...

I saw a new music shop in town that only services instruments made between the years 1600 and 1750.

"If It Ain't Baroque, Don't Fix It"

Did you hear about the new Netflix series? The one about a couple of poor female artists living in 1600s Rome?

I think it's called Two Baroque Girls

1600 out of 2000 high school seniors flunked their math exam in my city.

That's almost half!

I didn't realize just how long the Obama administration lasted...

Apparently the Baroque period started in the 1600s!

I saw a lady in tears at the store

She said she had lost an envelope with her tax refund inside. I gave her 100$ because I had just found about $1600 in the parking lot.
#payitforward

My first day out with my new $1600 Garrett metal detector I found a magnificent 30 carat wedding ring, not 3 feet under the ground.

But the bride was still wearing it and the police took it and won't give it back. Pricks!!

EVICTED FAMILY NEEDS HELP MOVING! MUST BE OUT BY JANUARY 20th!

Please send any unneeded moving supplies to:

1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW

Washington, DC 20500

What's the difference between my ex and the Titanic?

Only 1600 people went down on the titanic.

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First Time Teacher

Day 1 of home schooling


0800  opened school website to get assignments.


0900  found where assignments were hidden on the website.


0915  called school to have the website explained.


0930  called school again.


0945  Had wife call school ...

House Speaker: I now invite Bill de Blasio, the president of the United States to give his address to the nation.

Bill de Blasio : 1600 Pennsylvania Ave., Washington DC. Thank you!!

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New CEO

The board of directors at one company decided to hire new executive staff in order to increase the company's profits. The new CEO was a very tough guy who made it his mission to rid the company of slackers. One time he notices a guy in the hallway leaning against the wall picking his nose. As there ...

Just had a call from the bank

I've just had a call from the bank, I've got enough money to last the rest of my life
.

.

.

.

.

If I die by 1600 **(4pm)** today

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The Immortal Bard

*This is not my joke, it is actually a short story written by Isaac Asimov, but it is written like a joke. One that I found quite humorous. Hope it belongs here.*

"Oh, yes," said Dr. Phineas Welch, "I can bring back the spirits of the illustrious dead."

He was a little drunk, or maybe ...

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