I just spoke to Bill Withers. I told him “ain’t no sunshine” is bad grammar

He said “I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know”

Owning a house is like the music of Bill Withers.

When you move in it’s like “Lovely Day”, but after a few years it’s more like “Lien On Me”.

My friends keep sending me articles that Bill Withers died... I keep telling them

I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know



(R.I.P.)

What did Bill Withers say when his wife told him he should help out more around the house?

I know I know I know I know I know I know

I heard there’s gonna be a new compilation CD celebrating Bill Withers’ career

It’s going to be titled No Longer Withers

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

Stick him in an oven until his Bill Withers

My wife said, That old song by Bill Withers is really good. I said,

I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know.

If Reese Witherspoon married Bill Withers

...she'd have to give up the poon.

My wife's favorite song is "Ain't No Sunshine" by Bill Withers. She says so every time it's on the radio.

I reply "I know, I know, I know, I know, I know..."

What would be Reese Witherspoon's credits name if she starred in Matrix?

"Reese Wither", because there is no spoon.

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer

Get a large jar, place the duck in it and fill it up with vinegar. Then wait until it’s Bill Withers.

Did you hear about that Reese lady?

Guy 1: Hey, did you here about that celebrity that stabbed some poor guy to death? What was her name, Reese... Reese Wither... Wither...

Guy 2: Witherspoon?

Guy 1: No, with her knife.

Classic that I haven't seen for awhile

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A farmer took out an ad to sell one of his horses

The day the ad appeared in the paper, he heard a knock on his door.

When he opened the door, he didn't see anyone there.

"I'm down heah," said voice. The man looked down to see a dwarf there, standing no more than 2 1/2 feet tall. "I'm come to see the horse you have for sale. Wet me...

How do you turn a duck in to a soul singer?

Put it in the oven until its Bill Withers

Edit: if someone guesses the punchline change it to “rub it in the grass until its Al Green”.

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