There is nice weather, hot girls playing beach volleyball, barbeques everywhere, laughter and joy. Suddenly, Satan comes up to him. "Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a hamburger and check out the area. If you need anything or have a question, feel free to ask me", he says. ...
Where do tormented people sleep?
In despair bedroom.
A guy dies and goes to hell.
Satan welcomes him warmly and shakes his hand. He is given the keys to a gorgeous apartment, where he finds a brand new set of golf clubs, and a membership to the ritzy Hades Golf Club. He has servants to look after his every need.
In the garage is a brand new sports car and the fridge is sto...
Two Chicagoans die in an unfortunate car wreck.
Two Chicagoans die in an unfortunate car wreck.
Tragic, especially considering they didn’t exactly spend their days helping old ladies cross the street or volunteering at the Boys and Girls club. Nope, these fellows went straight to Hades.
The Devil, as is his custom, goes to greet hi...
A truck carrying synonym dictionaries has had an accident on the highway.
From the other cars, the passengers were shocked, tormented, amazed, incredulous, confused, paralyzed, stunned, bewildered, perplexed, amazed, dumbfounded, dumbstruck.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A man starts his own business
Within a few months his
business grows to the point where he needs to hire two
employees. He hires a woman named Sarah and a man named
Jack. Things are good.
A year goes by and the little company's sales are sagging. The owner realizes that there is not enough work
for his two em...
Two drunk guys walk into a hotel
snippering one word after another they finally manage to make themselves understood by the girl at the reception.
"So you want the cheapest double room we have, right? The only free one is on the 100th floor but the elevator is broken". The two guys, in order not to spend the night sleeping o...
Bill Gates dies and goes to hell.
Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked u...
Jesus walks into a bar.
Because the bar had caused him physical harm, Jesus told it "Because of your selfish need to whack people, I condemn thee to the confines of hell, as you will no longer be able to torment, for you will be tormented." And poof! The bar is gone.
The Golden Gate Bridge collapses.
An atheist dies and goes to hell.
The devil receives him and says, "Welcome to hell, my friend. I guess they have told you lots of awful things about this place, but it’s all BS. Relax, take a look around and you’ll see that this is not such a bad place."
Atheist takes a look around and finds that, indeed, hell is not so diff...
Ole and Sven go to Hell (long)
One day, Satan was walking through Hell, making sure the souls were properly tormented, until he came upon an unusual sight. Sitting next to a lava pool were Ole and Sven, decked out in parkas, hats, boots and gloves.
Confused, Satan walks up to them and asks them why they're dressed for win...
A man walks into his first session with a psychiatrist
His mood is almost as dark as the room, shades drawn almost fully closed with just enough light to cast shadows like a priest’s confessional stall. *Perfect*, he thinks, *this will be easier if he can’t see the tears welling in my eyes*.
He sits down and breathes a heavy sigh. The clock tick...
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