This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Working on an offshore oil rig.

So the new guy is being shown around the offshore oil rig. And while being fascinated by the ship and machinery, he nervously asks the old-timer, "We're going to be out here for over month, and I don't see any women. Not one. What do we when we get horny?"

The old timer nods knowingly and ...

After church on Sundays, the priest always sees parishioners in private. This Sunday, Mary came to him in tears.

“What happened?” asked the priest?

“Oh father, last evening my husband died.”

“That’s terrible! Did your husband have any last wishes?”

“Yes he did.”

“What did he say?”

“I beg of you, Mary. Put down the gun!”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are Saturdays and Sundays the strongest days?

Because all others are weak days.

another corny joke

Sundays are always a little sad, but the day before is a sadder day.

Sundays are awesome! Nothing feels better than spending all day laying around in my underwear.

Constantly getting kicked off the subway sucks though.

What do you call a barber that refuses to close on Sundays?

A Hair-etic.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just discovered I can’t get sick on Saturdays or Sundays

Turns out I have a weekend immune system.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.