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Sundays Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are Saturdays and Sundays the strongest days?

Because all others are weak days.

Sundays are always a little sad,

but the day before is a sadder day.

After church on Sundays, the priest always sees parishioners in private. This Sunday, Mary came to him in tears.

“What happened?” asked the priest?

“Oh father, last evening my husband died.”

“That’s terrible! Did your husband have any last wishes?”

“Yes he did.”

“What did he say?”

“I beg of you, Mary. Put down the gun!”

Redneck Divorce

A hillbilly walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for divorce.

Attorney: "May I help you?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorces".

Attorney: "Well do you have any grounds?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I got about a hundred acres."

Attorney: "No, you...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just discovered I can’t get sick on Saturdays or Sundays

Turns out I have a weekend immune system.

Sundays are awesome! Nothing feels better than spending all day laying around in my underwear.

Constantly getting kicked off the subway sucks though.

What do Sundays and the corona virus have in common?

The weakend.

Why is chick fil-a closed on sundays?

They need time to choke their chickens

Two fishermen are always fishing together on sundays

neither of them saying much.


Then, one sunday, one of the fisherman didn't show up.


But on the next sunday he was back in his old place, fishing.


The other fisherman was a bit worried, so he asked him where he was the previous sunday.

"Yeah sorry I got married...

Why do the Amazons like Sundays?

Because there's no mail. (Male)

Just found an envelope containing several severed fingers in my mailbox

It was weird because we don't usually get mail on Sundays

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