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Social Media Jokes

I hate it when people outright copy and paste somebody's joke on Twitter and post it on a different social media platform.

Retweet if you agree.

What is Captain Hook's least favorite social media?

Tick tock.

My doctor refuses to post my diagnosis to social media...

He says my disease is untweetable...

I hate it when people confuse one social media for another

Edit: Thanks for the likes

What's Forrest Gump's social media password?

1forrest1

Damn Social media

Facebook wants to know "What's on my mind?"
Twitter wants to know "What's happening?"
Google wants to know "Where I am?"
Siri/Alexa wants me to "Say something"!
Damn, the internet is turning into an online wife!

I tried making an anti social media platform.

But it never went anywhere.

What do pimples and social media influencers have in common?

They both start off small, randomly grow huge, explode, then leave a nasty scar until one day we forget they were ever there.

That's all guys, bye.

Which social media platform vegans hate the most?

Google meet

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When social media bans female boobs, but not men's, it shows a real intolerance...

lactose intolerance.

What's the difference between a social media influencer and a philosophy major?

The philosophy major needed a degree to be useless.

What's Pinocchio's favorite social media app?

BeReal

whats the difference between a social media influencer and a bench??

one can support a family.

What social media do frogs use

Rebbdit

Kanye West has decided to creat his own social media website

It will be called “Hear Ye, hear Ye”

I was going to make a social media platform called "Please Try Again Later",

but I figured Reddit would sue me for copyright violation.

Scientists have determined the optimal age at which humans are able to safely start using social media:

123 years old.

If social media were a thing in 1937

would people on the Hindenburg say:

"Here before this blows up."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Every time I see someone posting lyrics of inspirational songs on social media, I get really pissed off.

But I will survive.

My 4 yr Old son said "Daddy, why do people make up things that their children have said for social media?

Isn't it just inherently dishonest and indicative of inability to construct a compelling narrative themselves? "




Ps: This sub in a nutshell

A new social media site is sweeping over college campuses.

Mysafespace.

What is Thanos favourite social media?

Obviously Snapchat

My friend decided to quit almost all social media, but suddenly got addicted to the latest one by Meta.

He is hanging on…by a Thread.

It's crazy how many people are talking about the Oscars across all my social media feeds

Everything is popping up everywhere, all at once

What do you call a large reptile who likes to stir up petty fights on social media?

An Insta-gator.

[Dad joke] Social Media

I hear there is a new app for the COVID conscious.

It is called FaceMask.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The clitoris has over 8000 nerve endings

But it's still not as sensitive as a vegan on social media

What do you call a person who has flu but does not isolate themselves and is very active on social media?

Influen(zer)

I was going to make a social media joke.

But I'm pretty sure you have already Reddit.

What’s thanos’s favorite social media platform?

Snapchat

I'm starting a social media website for religious people with a lisp

Faithbook

What happens when a plant tries to add you on social media?

You get a fern request.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sociologists say that social media is creating the laziest generation ever.

I expressed my opinion in great detail by hitting the “Like” button.

The amount of advertising on social media is super surprising.

What’s not surprising? How much money you can save with GEICO Renters Insurance.

Why shouldn’t you recommend a book to a social media user?

Because they have probably already Reddit

I’m thinking of starting a social media network for chickens.

Not as a full time job just a way to make hens meet.

What do you get when you cross a social media site with a Chinese investor?

[redacted]

There's a new social media platform where people can take pictures of how they've been conned by their coke dealer.

Isntagram.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Being on social media is like having sex

It's fun until you know your parents do it too

My girlfriend is a social media expert.

She sent me a long message last month on why Twitter and Instagram are hands down the best Social Media apps.

But I only reddit now.

A lot of new social media sites are like some of the jokes on this sub:

Smaller, more condensed and ultimately worse than the original they ripped off

What’s it called when you are shadow banned by all social media and no one sees your posts?

A diary.

What do you call a highly cited epidemiology researcher with a social media presence?

An influenzer.

What do social media Influencers and perverts have in common?

They both think people want their exposure.

Me: Doctor, you've gotta help me! I'm addicted to Social Media.

Doctor: I don't follow you.

A Chinese-owned social media platform has been poisoning breath mints to accomplish their goals.

It's the TikTok tic tac tactic.

What did the French army general do on social media?

Retweet!

Social Media IRL

I’ve given up social media for the New Year and am trying to make friends outside Facebook while applying the same principles. Every day, I walk down the street and tell passersby what I’ve eaten, how I feel, what I did the night before, and what I will do tomorrow. Then I give them pictures of my f...

Seeing as how Mount St Helen's been all over social media...

I vote we change her name to Mount St Karen..as a warning for future generations

You gotta be careful on social media these days.

I mean, just today I accepted a friend request from Xerox. Turns out it was a scan.

The amount of salt on social media...

... is more than enough to cover all of the fries produced by McDonalds next year.

Antivaxxers should create social media accounts for their children

They'll go viral in no time.

going on social media these days is like going to church

after 5mins, I feel guilty af

Three social media news article writers walk into a bar

You won't believe what happens next.

What did the virus name it's social media account?

Influenceza

Have you heard about the social media stars who are coughing and sick?

They're Instagram Influenzas

I tried to start a religious social media page called Faithbook...

...but it was deemed offensive by the American Lisp Association.

At first, I thought my idea for a social media platform had failed

But then I made a 4chan.

I'm not sure where all the racists are going to go when social media platforms kick them off

They can't all go to Congress

For a while now, I always wondered how my parents passed the time in the 80’s and 90’s without social media

I asked my 32 other siblings and they’ve got no idea either.

What do you call an anti-vaxxer who’s big in social media?

An influenzar

How can you spot the losers in a social media War?

They're the ones yelling, "Retweet! Retweet!!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I can't call people Grammar Nazis on social media anymore....

Now I call them the Alt-Write.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What would you call a social media marketing genius?

Masterbaiter

I'm slightly peturbed by people these days showing off in weird, but understandable ways on social media.

Weird flex, but ok.

Trump has more impeachments than he does social media accounts.

This joke will never get old, ever.

A 19-year-old teen had to be admitted after he became addicted to social media.

He’s currently being tweeted in hospital.

What does Chipotle dread when making a post on social media?

Going viral

Just a little math problem for everyone

You purchase a social media company for $45 billion. After you make a series of bad managerial decisions, your company loses a large portion of its ad revenue. What is the value of X?

I asked my friend, “Hey, did you read that article about a social media platform that has some very toxic people, very questionable virtual communities, and people that come together to do amazing things?”

He replies: “Yeah, I Reddit.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A facebook user, a LINE user (japanese social media), and a redditor are having a drink at a bar.

The facebook user says "I've got to go home and spend time with the wifey."

The LINE user says "I must go home and spend time with the waifu."

The redditor says "Then I'll go home and spend time with the wifi."

Do you remember how before social media nobody cared what, where and with whom you ate?

Still nobody cares.

Stop writing hateful things about Alabama and the abortion laws all over social media.

They likely can't read, we will need to tell them in person.

Social media is like waking up in a mental asylum.

You have no idea you're committed until you try to leave.

A Social Media Consultant walks into a bar and orders a drink.

He copies-and-pastes the drink to five other bars and requests that they become a fan of it, then bills the first bar for six drinks.

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