This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You and 2 friends of yours walk through a forest

after a while you lot stumble upon a hut, from which a weird old lady, resembling a witch, comes out from. She slowly says
*"...do not step on the purple flower..."*
and then goes back into her hut.

A little confused, you exchange looks with your friends, shrug, and keep walking.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Stinky farts are just like somehow putting a silencer on a bazooka...

Silent-butt, deadly and extremely explosive.









sometimes flammable too

When should you wash a stinky slinky?

During spring cleaning

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy meet his girlfriend's father for the first time....

A highschool boy drives over to pick up his girlfriend, her father answers the door along with an old dog.

The boy is asked to sit and wait, but he is very nervous and becomes gassy. (Thankfully I am sitting right next to the dog he thinks to himself)

The boy lets out a silent but stin...

Three women die and go to heaven

There are ducks everywhere on the ground and floors. St. Peter tells them: "This is Heaven, you can do anything you like, as long as you don't step on a duck. If you step on a duck, you will be punished."

The first woman tries very carefully to not step on a duck, but slips up and accidentall...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does a Teletubby have after performing anal?

A stinky winky

What do you call a stinky lawyer?

Law and Odor

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My 5yo asked me to tell you guys this joke I'm so sorry...

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Cause your butt stinks!! Ha! Stinky butt



He doesn't understand downvotes so I'll eat the loss of karma cause this made him happy

Why was it so stinky by the lake?

Bass terds.

What does an Italian genius say to a stinky person?

Eureka!



(I'll see myself out)

What's the difference between an open box of stinky cheese and a Kung Fu master?

One is loose brie and the other is Bruce Lee

A old Woman goes to the doctor

She says to the doctor, "I have a really embarrassing problem and I have finally convinced myself to come and see you"

"You see, I constantly fart, but they don't smell and they don't make any noise so it hasn't bothered me all these years. I've even farted three times since coming into your ...

This new daily fiber regimen has really helped with my regularity issues. Now, every day at 5am I take a big ol' stinky poo.

I just wish I could get out of bed before 6am.

Just in time for the farmers thanksgiving. NSFW

There was this farmer that every morning would wake up and the first thing he would do is fart. Wet farts, dry farts, stinky farts, and especially loud farts. His wife would constantly tell him, “Honey, you really need to go to the doctor and have them look at that, one day you’ll end up farting you...

Stinky smell in the car ...

-Sir.. how many horsepower is your car?
- 120 horses
- I am afraid that one of them is Dead.

I really just don't like any of these fancy and stinky cheeses.

Maybe I'm just uncultured.

I was having an argument with my girlfriend and she accused me of being childish.

What does she know? She's just a stinky poo face.

Why was the jacket stinky?

Because it was a windbreaker.

A Old, wealthy man had three sons.

He promised each of them that if they learned a new, 'exotic' skill, he would give them a fortune. So, they set out. They came to a river with 3 paths. They agreed to split up. The first brother learned to shoot tiny things like birds, flies, etc. The second one learned to fix things with a hammer. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An interesting quote...

«The one that falls asleep with an itchy butt wakes up with stinky fingers»

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two explorers are walking down a path in a jungle. One signals the other to stop and come over with his hand. "Don't make a noise." he whispers, and points to a place between two trees...

... they slowly come close to find a steaming pile of shit. "What does this mean?" he asks taking off his hat and fanning the smell away.


"Well Bill, if you find a piece of stinky shit sure enough there is an asshole nearby!"

One day, a farmer goes to the store...

He asked for one can of dog food.
Store owner: "Boy, you ain't got a dog."
Famer: "Yeah I do."
Store owner: "Prove it, then."
Farmer: "Fine!"
So the farmer got his dog and brung it to the store, and got his dog food and left.
The next day, the farmer goes back to the store.
Farm...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Confucius say...

...man with itchy asshole have stinky fingers.


...man who fish in other man's pond often catch crabs.


...baseball wrong. Man with 4 balls not walk.


...man who fart in church sit in own pew.


(Feel free to add more)

What do you call a donkey with one leg?

A wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye?
A winky wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye making love?
A bonky winky wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind? <...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There’s an old couple that start dating at 70

After about a month of dating, they decide to get a little freaky.

So they start doing things and the woman says to the man, “you know, it’s been a long time since someone has gone... down there”.

So the man obliges and makes his way down there and after only a short bit he says, “ I...

My son's Star Wars joke.

What do you give to a stinky Jedi?

De-Yoda-rant

So this guy and his wife are driving home in the rain when a skunk appears...

The guy swerves and strikes the skunk nonetheless. Being an animal lover he stops and assesses the soggy critter. It breathes and he immediately scoops it up. "Quick!" He says to his wife, "warm this skunk in your lap while I drive to the vet!"

"But it's wet and stinky" she protests.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A police officer catches Dave duck-hunting, checks to make sure he has the right license.

So Dave went hunting in the woods, one day, and ***BAM!***, shot a duck.

A bored, nearby trooper waiting in his patrol car near the highway hears the gunshot, gets out, and runs into the woods to find Dave holding the duck.

The trooper yells, pointing at Dave, "You stop right there! L...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A 1st grade teacher brings his class out for a science field trip to the local park

At the park, one of the kids screams "oh look! There's a big doggy poo poo here!"

The teacher requests that the class gather around and explains

"Look kids, I just taught you about our five senses haven't I?

Don't just rely on one of your senses to observe the world. We have fiv...

An old woman goes to the doctor's and says she has an embarrassing problem...

She knows when she's breaking wind but it doesn't make any sound and has lost any sort of stinkiness that it used to have.

She went on to say that in fact she'd done it three times since coming in the room- and that as it's just so unnatural, it's really bothering her. He gives her some pills...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yet another Little Johnny joke...

Little Johnny was in the classroom one day when the teacher came in and said...

Teacher: Ok class today we're on the letter S! Does anyone have any S words?

Little Johnny raises his hand high. The teacher looks around the room for more hands. Sarah then raised her hand.

Teacher:...

This guy was with a hooker for the first time. .

She took him into her room and asked him what would be his pleasure. Being naive, he asked, "Do you have any suggestions?"

She said, "Would you like French style, Straight, Around the World, or maybe 69?"

He replies, "I'll try one of those 69's."

As they were engaged in a 69, th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Politicians are like soft poops

They move with a light push, leave a stinky mess behind, and require lots of paper to clean up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A married man farts all the time...

And in one of his particulary explosive bouts of wind, his long suffering wife says the following. "One day you'll fart so hard you'll fart your guts right out!!"

With that, he just pays his wife's words with no heed and goes about his business.

A few days later, after the previous nig...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three Blind Men and an Elephant

The first blind man gropes around and feels the elephant's butthole, butt cheeks and tail. After a few minutes he declares an elephant is like a stinky pig. The second blind man gropes around and feels the elephant's testicles, and after rubbing them for a few minutes, declares the first man is wron...

A Baked Bean lover

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him.

One day, he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, "She'll never...

After 37 years of marriage. Jake dumped his wife for his Young secretary.

His new girlfriend demanded that they live in Jake and Edith’s multi million dollar home and since the man’s lawyers were a little better he prevailed.

He gave Edith his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out. She spent the 1st day packing her belongings into boxes crates and suitcases.

O...

A woman ask her husband if he wants to go bowling or spend a night together at home...

The man said:

"I don't want to spend my time sticking my fingers in stinky holes where everyone putted their fingers in..

Let's go bowling!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ping pong balls

Many years back there was a king who had the most beautiful daughter in all the lands. The king issues a challenge. "The first knight who can find the most ping pong balls gets to marry my daughter".

The first knight returns with 300 ping pong balls. Two days later, the second knight comes ...

Sock it to Me

On the first night of their honeymoon, the husband isn’t sure how to tell his bride about his stinky feet and smelly socks, while the wife is wondering how to break the news to him about her awful breath, which so far, she’s been able to cover up. After some soul-searching, the husband gathers his n...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Onion Snatch

One day, 2 women were at a cafe catching up. One of them notices that the other isn't her normal self.

"What's wrong?" Asks one of the women

"I'm feeling really stressed out"

"What's going on?"

"Well to be honest, I haven't had sex in a while"

"And why not? You'...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When Halitosis Mets Bromodosis...

(Cross post from r/relationships) Once there was a girl with such bad breath that no one wanted to date her, no matter how hard she tried. Across town there was a man who inherited a very severe case of stinky feet that he, too, was deemed undatable. One night when the stars aligned just right, thes...

How do dinosaurs smell?

Ex-stinky

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Confucius says - He who goes to bed with itchy butt

Wake up with stinky fingers.

Just remembered this from when I was 13

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Homeless man saves suicidal victims life.

A beautiful young lady was standing on the side of a building, contemplating suicide when a homeless man walks up and says " are you going to kill your self? " the young lady replied " YES! And your not stopping me " so he tells her " since your gonna die anyways, can we have sex before you ju...

I remember this from a Monty Python

"My dog has no nose!" Says one man. His friend asks "well how does he smell?" "Stinky!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old couple...

An old couple has lived together for many years. They lived a happy and long life together. Every morning - the husband would wake up and let out a stinky, warm fart. This had agitated the wife and she would always tell him, that one morning he will fart out his guts. One day she decided to have rev...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.