UPJOKE
smellymalodorousodorousnoisomeodoriferousrottenlousystinkingickybadniffymephiticrancidfetidfoetid

What do you call a stinky lawyer?

Law and Odor

Why was it so stinky by the lake?

Bass terds.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Stinky farts are just like somehow putting a silencer on a bazooka...

Silent-, deadly and extremely explosive.









sometimes flammable too

What does an Italian genius say to a stinky person?

Eureka!



(I'll see myself out)

Stinky smell in the car ...

-Sir.. how many horsepower is your car?
- 120 horses
- I am afraid that one of them is Dead.

An old women goes to the doctor

She says to the doctor, "I have a really embarrassing problem and I have finally convinced myself to come and see you"

"You see, I constantly fart, but they don't smell and they don't make any noise so it hasn't bothered me all these years. I've even farted three times since coming into your ...

When should you wash a stinky slinky?

During spring cleaning

Why was the jacket stinky?

Because it was a windbreaker.

I really just don't like any of these fancy and stinky cheeses.

Maybe I'm just uncultured.

What's the difference between an open box of stinky cheese and a Kung Fu master?

One is loose brie and the other is Bruce Lee

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

What do you call a donkey who is always getting up to mischief, is tall and thin, forgot his morning coffee, is handsome and strong, smells really bad, loves country music, has one eye, and three legs?

A hanky-panky, lanky, cranky, spunky, hunky, stinky dinky, honky tonky, winky, wonky donkey!

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Ancient Chinese Proverb

Man who go to bed with itchy , wake up with stinky finger.

Confessions of a newly wed.

On the first night of their honeymoon, the husband isnโ€™t sure how to tell his bride about his stinky feet and smelly socks, while the wife is wondering how to break the news to him about her awful breath, which so far, sheโ€™s been able to cover up.

After some soul-searching, the husband gather...

The Divorce Settlement

On the first day, he sadly packed his belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, he had the movers come to collect his things.

On the third day, he sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining-room table, by candle-light; he put on some soft background musi...

Three women die and go to heaven

There are ducks everywhere on the ground and floors. St. Peter tells them: "This is Heaven, you can do anything you like, as long as you don't step on a duck. If you step on a duck, you will be punished."

The first woman tries very carefully to not step on a duck, but slips up and accidentall...

What do you call a donkey with one leg?

A wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye?
A winky wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye making love?
A bonky winky wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind? <...

An old woman goes to the doctor's and says she has an embarrassing problem...

She knows when she's breaking wind but it doesn't make any sound and has lost any sort of stinkiness that it used to have.

She went on to say that in fact she'd done it three times since coming in the room- and that as it's just so unnatural, it's really bothering her. He gives her some pills...

My can transform from one Toy Story character to another depending on how much I wash them

They go from a Woody to a Stinky Pete

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Restroom Thinker

I came here, To and stink,

But all I do, Is sit and think,

And here I sit, Broken hearted,

Couldn't , But only farted,

Some come here to sit and think,

Some come here to and stink,

Often I come here to scratch my balls,

And read all the ...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Confucius say...

...man with itchy have stinky fingers.


...man who fish in other man's pond often catch crabs.


...baseball wrong. Man with 4 balls not walk.


...man who fart in church sit in own pew.


(Feel free to add more)

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A boy meet his girlfriend's father for the first time....

A highschool boy drives over to pick up his girlfriend, her father answers the door along with an old dog.

The boy is asked to sit and wait, but he is very nervous and becomes gassy. (Thankfully I am sitting right next to the dog he thinks to himself)

The boy lets out a silent but stin...

So this guy and his wife are driving home in the rain when a skunk appears...

The guy swerves and strikes the skunk nonetheless. Being an animal lover he stops and assesses the soggy critter. It breathes and he immediately scoops it up. "Quick!" He says to his wife, "warm this skunk in your lap while I drive to the vet!"

"But it's wet and stinky" she protests.
...

A woman ask her husband if he wants to go bowling or spend a night together at home...

The man said:

"I don't want to spend my time sticking my fingers in stinky holes where everyone putted their fingers in..

Let's go bowling!"

A guy gets to the doctor, farting over and over...

- Hi doc, I don't know what's wrong, but I can't stop farting. Luckily it has no smell!
The doctor looks at him, write down a prescription and say:
- Take this for a week and come back.
So the guy does. And returns still farting to the doctor:
- I took the pills, but I still can't stop f...

My son's Star Wars joke.

What do you give to a stinky Jedi?

De-Yoda-rant

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Yet another Little Johnny joke...

Little Johnny was in the classroom one day when the teacher came in and said...

Teacher: Ok class today we're on the letter S! Does anyone have any S words?

Little Johnny raises his hand high. The teacher looks around the room for more hands. Sarah then raised her hand.

Teacher:...

I was having an argument with my girlfriend and she accused me of being childish.

What does she know? She's just a stinky poo face.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Politicians are like soft poops

They move with a light push, leave a stinky mess behind, and require lots of paper to clean up.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Confucius says - He who goes to bed with itchy

Wake up with stinky fingers.

Just remembered this from when I was 13

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A policeman stands near the road...

Waiting for some cars to pass by. Finally a family sedan appears in his sight and as the car approaches the officer gives a signal to the driver to pull up. A young man and a young woman are sitting on the front seats while an elderly pair had taken the seats behind them. The sedan stops and the pol...

I remember this from a Monty Python

"My dog has no nose!" Says one man. His friend asks "well how does he smell?" "Stinky!"

Just in time for the farmers thanksgiving.

There was this farmer that every morning would wake up and the first thing he would do is fart. Wet farts, dry farts, stinky farts, and especially loud farts. His wife would constantly tell him, โ€œHoney, you really need to go to the doctor and have them look at that, one day youโ€™ll end up farting you...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Homeless man saves suicidal victims life.

A beautiful young lady was standing on the side of a building, contemplating suicide when a homeless man walks up and says " are you going to kill your self? " the young lady replied " YES! And your not stopping me " so he tells her " since your gonna die anyways, can we have before you ju...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A 1st grade teacher brings his class out for a science field trip to the local park

At the park, one of the kids screams "oh look! There's a big doggy poo poo here!"

The teacher requests that the class gather around and explains

"Look kids, I just taught you about our five senses haven't I?

Don't just rely on one of your senses to observe the world. We have fiv...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A married man farts all the time...

And in one of his particulary explosive bouts of wind, his long suffering wife says the following. "One day you'll fart so hard you'll fart your guts right out!!"

With that, he just pays his wife's words with no heed and goes about his business.

A few days later, after the previous nig...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

An old couple...

An old couple has lived together for many years. They lived a happy and long life together. Every morning - the husband would wake up and let out a stinky, warm fart. This had agitated the wife and she would always tell him, that one morning he will fart out his guts. One day she decided to have rev...

A Baked Bean lover

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him.

One day, he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, "She'll never...
8 jokes are hidden here because they may not be suitable for all ages.
show them anyway

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.