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A woman goes to a fortune teller As they sat there in the candlelit tent, the mystic waved her hands around the crystal ball, divining the woman’s future. Suddenly, the sooth-sayer’s hands went to her face and a gasp of horror escaped her mouth.

“I don’t know how to tell you this, so I’ll be blunt.” the fortune teller says. “You need to prepare yourself to become a widow. Your husband will be murdered in a manner most gruesome before the year is done.”

The woman was petrified, unable to process the information that’s been given to he...

I can't stand all these negative horses

I've got no time for neigh sayers

Why did Joe Rogan take ivermectin?

To prove the neigh sayers wrong.

What do you call a pessimistic horse?

A neigh-sayer

What do you call a critical horse?

A nay-sayer.

Thought of this while delivering mail in the countryside.

What do you call a disagreeable horse?

A neigh sayer

Why aren’t horses allowed in the Catholic church?

Because they’re neigh sayers

What do you call someone who doesn't belive it is June yet?

A May-Sayer

As a farmer, my days can be a bit lonely. I find solace in discussing my dreams and goals with my animals. Well all of my animals except for the horses, never the horses...

I wouldn’t discuss anything with that group of neigh sayers.

What do you call a disputatious horse?

A naahh sayer.



Credit:14 yr old me.

There are some that are against the practice of eating horse

but I say never mind the neigh sayers.

Why are horses the most unproductive animal to have in office meetings?

Because they're all just neigh-sayers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Horses are the biggest haters I know

Fucking neigh-sayers

Do you think horses are negative?

They seem like real neigh sayers, and they're always whinnying about everything

Horses are very pessimistic

In fact they're the worst neigh-sayers I know

So I went to a stable for a self confidence boost

I found myself surrounded by a bunch of neigh-sayers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Topical Joes (5/13)

Alright guys, here we are to recap the day's jokes. Let's get started.

First off in the news, it looks like the TSA arrested a woman for singing Whitney Houston on an airplane - but you should've seen what the TSA did when they caught those ridiculous musical militants of the Elton Jihad.
...

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