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What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?

COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blonde Wife

One winter morning during breakfast a husband and wife in Northern Minnesota were listening to the radio.

They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through."
...

Why do golf announcers whisper?

Because they don’t want to wake up the people watching.

I was the announcer at the women’s day expo..

“All the women with fashion sense and business sense sit in the first row. All the women with one or the other sit in the second row.” I announced.

“What row do you sit in if you have neither?” A perplexed woman asked.

I answered her “LuLaRoe.”

What spooked the mexican soccer announcer in the middle of the night?

Ghooooooooooooul

Why did the TV announcer get mad?

Because someone touched that dial

What did the bad World Cup announcer get in his stocking?

COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!

What vegetable can work as a sports announcer?

A common tater.

Proof that blondes are not, in fact, dumb.

There was a huge convention where all the guests were blonde. It was decided to prove once and for all that blondes are not really dumb.

They got the smartest blonde in the room up on stage. The announcer asks "What is 100 divided by 10?" The blonde thinks for a moment and says, "Is it s...

What did Santa bring the naughty soccer announcer?

COOOOOAAAALLLLLL!!!!!

What do you call a potato announcer?

A commenTater

Soviet joke: a family is watching the evening news when the announcer says taxes on vodka will be going up.

“This means there will be some major changes for our family, comrades,” says the man.

“You mean you will be drinking less?” asks his son.

“Nyet,” says the father. “You will all be eating less.”

Two women decide to make some money by betting on horse races.

They come to the track and start thinking which horse to bet upon. After all, they don't know much about the matter. Suddenly, one says:

**Woman 1**: Listen, I have an idea. What's your cup size?

**Woman 2**: C.

**Woman 1**: And mine is D. That's three and four. Three plus four ...

My wife and kids are leaving me because of my obsession with acting like a horse race announcer.

“And they’re off..”

What did the spanish soccer announcer invest in?

**GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD**

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was watching TV and the announcer said that there was a documentary about the clitoris on the red button...

But I couldn’t find it.

The Blonde Convention

Once, there was a huge meeting of all of the blondes in the world. They had heard all of the jokes and wanted to prove once and for all that they were not as stupid as the jokes made them seem. They all chose one of them, who they all thought was the smartest to answer one question. She went up to t...

A man was driving down highway 407 when a radio announcer said: “be warned of a car driving the wrong way along the highway”

The man, peeking out the window, scoffs to himself as he thinks “just one? All these idiots are going the wrong way!”

I just found out how TV announcers enter brothels. And I'll share that secret...

But first.

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