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Retaliated Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

After seeing my new tattoo, my angered wife retaliated by getting a breast reduction...

tit for tat.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was playing golf

..and he missed his shot

"Fuck I missed!" He exclaimed

Shot after shot he would shout the same phrase.

"Fuck, I missed!"

Behind him, was a priest who was very angry with this man's profanity. The priest says to the man,

" If you swear once more, I will make god s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some bloke at the bus station hit me with a stick for no reason.

Naturally, I retaliated and beat the living shit out of him.


Just for good measure, I kicked his labrador as well.

A man and a woman are painfully flirting

The restaurant was practically empty, save for them. The man and the woman sat in silence, each waiting for the other to begin.

The man started.

"H-Hi." **Oh god, I sound like an idiot.**

"...Hi." *My Voice! Please come out!*

"So...uh...um...do w-weather?" **What is wrong...

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The Rabbi and the Cardinal

A large number of Jewish immigrants have moved into a pastoral Italian town. The locals, fearful that resources won't be able to accommodate this influx of people, complain to their local cardinal who agrees to settle the matter. He accepts a challenge to a theological debate with the wisest of th...

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