In a very poor village in Vietnam, farmers had a feud because of a cow eating off the wrong rice paddy.

One farmer got so upset he hired the local hitman to off the cow. The village was so poor the hitman had no guns, so killed the cow by bashing it with a porcelain figure.

Police said it was the first case they ever saw of a Knick Knack Paddy Whack.

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If I'm ever on Family Feud

I'm going to make one of my answer "Your butthole." That way I can hear the host yell out, "Show me your butthole!"

As the YouTube makeup influencers feuded with each other i couldn't help but wonder...

Had their relationship been built using a bad *foundation?*

What do you call a feud between two of Genghis Khan’s generals?

Mongolian beef

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There were two morticians that had a bitter family feud

for many years. On his death bed, one mortician told his son he wished to finally put an end to the quarrel, and requested to be cremated by his rival. His son nodded, but noticed his father was in pain, and asked if he needed a nurse. The man said, "No, I'm fine, it's just a bit uncomfortable with ...

A long time ago, a young prince was married to a young princess, ending the feud between two warring kingdoms.

On their wedding night, the princess says to the prince, "I offer you my honor."
The prince replies, "I'm honored by your offer".

That's how it went all night- honor and offer, honor and offer...

A church got a new pastor, who the music minister immediately disliked. Eventually, their conflict spilled out into the Sunday services.

The first week, the pastor preached about commitment and how we should dedicate our lives to serving one another. The music minister led the song "I Shall Not Be Moved."

The second week, the pastor preached about tithing and how important it was for the congregation to contributed to the chu...

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A city with a 400 year old feud about penis size...

The men on the east side of the river say they have larger penises, the men on the west claim to have the largest. The citizens wanted to put the feud to rest once and for all. So they decided to do a study. A very scientifically sound study, double blind, all that stuff. So everything went as plann...

A man and his wife were watching Family Feud...

When this question came up:

"What age do women stop looking for Mr.Perfect and settle for Mr.Okay?"

"25!" his wife shouted.

"What, that's crazy!" the man argued.

"Well that's when I married you."

Two Indian restaurants across the street from each other were involved in a feud

The feud had gone on a long time and was pretty extensive. There were pricing wars, sabotage, recruiting chefs from each others restaurants, stealing recipes... The restaurant on the right side of the street was starting to gain an advantage as they were being recognized for their delicious tandoo...

Once a feud broke out between boys and girls...

..in a college. To take revenge the boys posted on the notice board- 50 percent of the girls are stupid.
The girls got infuriated, and demanded justice. Its only when the college administration pressurized the boys to change what they have written on the notice board, the situation was brought u...

Where do people go to argue in the mall?

They don't. No one goes to malls anymore, but they used to go to the Feud Court.

A man wins a chance to appear on a game show

A man won a chance to appear on a mystery game show. The chances were jeopardy, family feud, lingo, and the price is right. His wife a beautiful Spanish lady, the love of his life, told him that if he lost the game show she would divorce him because she couldn't handle the shame. So, he auditioned f...

Did you hear that Steve Harvey and his wife got into a fight?

It was a family feud

What would a farmer's wife accuse him of caring more about than her?

His hoe

Source: Old Family Feud episode

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My Friend, Ving.

So in my calculus class last year in math, there were these two Chinese twins. Ving, and Ling. Ving was always super cool with me. In exchange for answers (he was super smart) I would hang out with him and be his friend and stuff. After I cheated off of him and studied with him though, I did get to ...

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A frustrated middle eastern man is walking along the beach... (NSFW)

When suddenly he stubs his toe on something in the sand. He reaches down under the sand and discovers a golden lamp. He picks it up and excitedly brushes it off when suddenly a enormous genie appears.

"I am the Genie of the Lamp and I shall grant you one wish, if it is within my power."
...

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Two veterinarians are walking through the woods...

Two veterinarians are walking through the woods. The first vet states that he is the best vet in the world, and the second vet disagrees. The argument goes on for about 5 minutes when they stop at an old oak tree with an owl sitting on a branch.

The first vet says, "To prove it, I bet I can p...

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Two men arguing

There was two men one named bill , the other clarence . they lived on opposite sides of a river . Neither of the men could swim , and each day they would stand on opposite sides of the river cursing at each other . Bill would always say if I could swim I would come over there an kick your butt . Thi...

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