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A summary of the world's religions

Catholicism: Shit happens.
Protestantism: Let this shit happen to someone else.
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to us?
Hinduism: This shit has happened before.
Confucianism: Confucius says "Shit happens"
Rastafarianism: Let's roll up this shit and smoke...

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Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term:

"Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof."

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools off when it...

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There are judges for different religions and they are categorized alphabetically.

There's Judge Atheist A, Judge Buddhist B, Judge Christian C and...

Judge Jew D.

Was Mike Tyson against religions?

Because he kept punching people in the faith all his career!

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A comprehensive observation about common religions and religious practices.

Jainism: You must not disturb shit

Bhuddism: You must become one with the shit.

Taoism: Shit happens

Shintoism: Our ancestors thought of this shit.

Hinduism: Eating meat makes you a shit person.

Paganism: Here's some shit that represents other shit.

Reform J...

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Religions are so different. Jews do not recognize Christ. Anglicans do not recognize the Pope.

Baptists do not recognize each other at the liquor store.

Religions are like e^x.

No matter how you try to differentiate them or integrate them. They remain the same.

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The Great Debate

Several centuries ago, the Pope decided that all the Jews had to leave the Vatican. Naturally there was a big uproar from the Jews, so the Pope agreed to debate with a member of their community. If the Jews won, they could stay. If the Pope won, the Jews would leave.

Knowing they had no choic...

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The rules for religions and penises are the same.

It's okay to have one, and it's okay to be proud of it, but don't whip it out in public and don't shove it down children's throats.

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Two men walked into a Chinese restaurant and sat down to eat. To pass the time, they started talking about different countries and major religions.

"Hey Sam. You ever wondered whether there are any Jews in China?" one man asked his buddy.
"Whoa I never thought of that. Lets ask our waiter He's Chinese."

So they called the waiter and asked. "So we were curious. Are there any Chinese Jews?" one man asked.
The waiter looked confused ...

Why aren’t there any religions of blind people?

They can’t see who’s following them.

Walk

I went to a Inter-Religion Integration Seminar.

The Bishop came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!”

I smiled and told him I was not paralysed.

The Rabbi came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of God Almighty, ...

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar

They all begin discussing their own churches and synagogue. As the night goes on, they drink more and more, and the discussion starts to turn competitive. Each starts to boast about how eloquent they are, and how great they are at converting non believers. Eventually, the bartender gets sick of it. ...

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