Climate change is causing people to move into hilly and mountainous regions

According to one expert on YouTube it is plain unsettling.

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An academic from Oxford University is writing a paper on sheep shagging technique.

Having no personal experience on the subject, he decides to travel across the country and interview farmers from different regions to find out how they shag their sheep.

First, he visits a farmer in Scotland and asks him what his sheep shagging technique is.

“Well laddy, after grabbi...

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The man anticipated a night of ravenous lovemaking when the Russian woman entered wearing nothing but a bra and panties. However, as she was walking, he heard a faint “Hello! Hello!” coming from her nether regions with each step she took...

“Where’s that sound coming from?” the man asked with a confused look on his face.

She smiled and said, “Don’t worry, that's just my Privyet parts.”

Do I use over elaborate sentences?

Do Ursine mammals defecate in Circumpolar Arboreal Forest Regions?

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Two FBI agents who knew sensitive classified info went to a conference in Russia...

Turns out, the conference was really long and *really* boring; almost to the point the agents got mad, so when it was over, they decided to go to a nearby nightclub for some drinks and fun.

They had just ordered their drinks and started drinking up when two incredibly gorgeous Russian women c...

As a lover of history, I always wondered how Genghis Khan would seek shelter whilst traversing various regions of the vast Mongol empire

Then it struck me. Finally! A regional Khan tent.

An oil prospector is waiting at the gates of heaven.

St. Peter had some bad news for an oil prospector who appeared at the pearly gates of heaven: “You’re qualified for admission,” said St. Peter, “but, as you can see, the section for oil prospectors is packed. There’s no way to fit you in.”

After a moment, the prospector asked to say just four...

Captain John McGrue was one of the most respected explorers

Born in England, he became known for his seafaring skills at a young age. At the age of 20, he heard the legends of the greatest drinks in the world, a quest many explorers had tried, but unfortunately none could complete the trip. McGrue was talked out of it by every friend, until at 28, already an...

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Why are there regions in England named Wessex, Sussex, Essex and Northumbria?

... because nobody wants to live in a place called Nosex.

My friend laughs at regions with small mountains

He thinks they're hill areas

NSFW A 90 year old woman walks by her bathroom

A 90 year old woman walks by her bathroom on fall evening, and sees her 90 year old husband. He has a can of spray paint and is spray painting his nether regions. She stops and yells, “ You idiot! You’re supposed to turn your clock back!”

Carobs grow on carob trees in warm climates. They are frequently transported to other regions by air.

Usually by pilots of the carob bean.

My friend had a dream of studying birds native to coastal regions before he died.

It's honestly really sad he never got to accomplish his Sea*goals*

A man contracted a rare STD...

He finally went to the hospital to get his manhood examined.

He nervously took off his pants, "Doctor, what is wrong with me? It's been getting more and more painful down there."

After close examination, the doctor said in a grim voice, "I'm afraid we have to perform surgery to have ...

A guy and his girlfriend are in a sportscar...

...the guy is doing daredevil stunts to impress her.
She turns to him, and says, "If you can go over 150 mph, I'll take off all of my clothes."
The guy obliges, and the car speeds down the road at 175mph, so the girlfriend tears all of her clothes off.

The guy loses control of the car...

Pierre, the famous French fighter pilot

Pierre, the famous French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the river Seine. It is a beautiful day and love is in the air, so Marie leans over to Pierre and says: "Pierre, kiss me". So our hero grabs a bottle of red wine and splashes it on Marie's lips.<...

How do you make a Dutch person happy?

Explore their nether regions

A northern man goes on a date with a southern woman during his vacation to the south.

Southerner: What do you and your friends do in your free time?

Northerner: We love to play the well known game called Club Penguin. Our favorite activity is to spend hours together on the iceberg.

Southerner: I play Club Penguin too!



As the two people from different regi...

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The best blow job ever!

Henry and his drinking buddy are sitting at the bar one day, having a few brews, when Henry's buddy declares " I've had the best blow job ever, from the most amazing prostitute I've been graced to know!". Henry, who is amused by the statement, asked "what made it so special!?" To which his buddy rep...

Salty Pete The Pirate

So, Salty Pete the pirate hobbles into the bar one night. I mean, he's so piratey. He's got a parrot on his shoulder, an eye patch, the peg leg and hook for a hand, and he for some reason has the helm of his ship stuck to his nether regions.

Anyway, he hobbles up to the bar and tosses down...

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The Gynaecologist’s Assistant

A young man goes into the Job Center in Downtown Los Angeles and sees a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested, he goes to learn more.

"Can you give me some more details?" he asks the clerk.

The clerk pulls up the file and says, "The job entails getting the ladies ...

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Japanese Toilet

I'm from the UK. My best mate from uni moved to Japan a few years ago for work, he's settled down there and married a nice Japanese girl. Whenever he's been back over, he's always invited me to come and visit them, and this year I finally had the chance.

The flight over was great, the ride fr...

Father Patrick had one weakness as a priest

He *hated* the English. His favorite fire and brimstone line was "...and you'd go to Hell with the English!" He had been admonished by his Bishop more than once about this.

Well, the Bishop was visiting for Holy Week when Father Patrick again assigned the English to the nether regions, and he...

Caesar on Cleopatra:

I, Caesar, when I learned of the fame
Of Cleopatra, I straightway laid claim.
Ahead of my legions,
I invaded her regions,
I saw, I conquered, I came.

A pirate walks into a bar.

He has driving wheel sticking out his nether regions.

The bartender asks him "Doesn't that make you go crazy?"

The pirate replies "Argh. It's driving me nuts!"

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I saw a 7-eleven coffee cup on the table in the break room.

I was curious, so I looked on the back of the cup. It said that the coffee beans were mountain-grown in the world's finest coffee-growing regions and were inspected for premium quality five times prior to being roasted. I snuck a sip of the coffee and thought, "Wow. That's impressive."

Becau...

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The terrible 2nd place prize

A girl enters a game show that allows her to win a trip to space and visit the cosmos at the furthest regions of our solar system. The girl must compete in games related to space and physics to determine if she’s got what it takes to go.

After hours of grueling physical and emotional trauma t...

You'll have to travel to Oxford

A bloke goes into the jobcentre in Newcastle and sees a card advertising for a gynaecologists assistant, interested he goes to find out more..
'Can you give me some more details about this?' He said to the guy behind the desk.
The jobcentre guy shifts through his files and replies 'ah yes, I'...

Aboriginal Rituals

A couple years back, I stumbled on a surprising reference to the astonishing longevity of Aboriginal shamans living in the Australian outback. Reliable birth records aren't available before the early 20th century, but government officials have noted an astounding number of nonagenarians and centenar...

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NSFW Pierre the French Fighter Pilot NSFW

It is springtime in Paris and Pierre the French fighter pilot is back from the war and having a picnic lunch with his lover Millie. He is wooing her with stories of his bravery in the war and she exclaims, "Oh Pierre! Kiss me!

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So he pours the bottle of red wine on her lips ...

Where's the fire.....

A firefighter’s wife suspects the hubby is getting some on the side. Being non confrontational , she plays it close to the chest. One day she goes through the hubby’s car and discovers a packet of unused condoms.

With a knowing smile, she soaks ‘em in jalapeño for an hour before putting the...

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