Rattle Snake Jokes

Two buddies are out hunting. After a long day, they sit down to have a drink and relax. They both sit down on some fallen logs. Right as they settle in, a rattlesnake comes up from under the log, and bites one of them right in the dick.

The man starts screaming and falls to the ground. His bu... read more

Don't fuck with either one of them.

A rattle snake bites Joe Junior on the dick.



So Billy Bob phones 911. He says "Help me please. My friend has been bitten by a rattle snake."

The operator says "Okay. What I need you to do is put your mouth on the wound and suck out the poison."

So Joe Junior says "What... read more

The Lone Ranger gets off his horse for a piss by a cactus. Suddenly, a rattle snake lunges out and bites him right on the dick. Tonto hears him scream and comes running over. He's lying there on his back, moaning in pain.

Tonto says, "I'll ride back to that native village we passed a while a... read more

Three cow boys were sitting around a campfire telling their manly stories, first cow boy said,” I must be the toughest cowboy of them all, I once wrestled an angry bull into submission.” Second cowboy said,” that’s nothin, I once but a rattle snake’s head off and drank the venom.” The third cowboy s... read more

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were out riding when the Lone Ranger needed to shit. So finding a shrub, he squatted down to do his business. Suddenly he started yelling and screaming for Tonto. "Tonto! A rattle snake bit my asshole. Ride into town and get the doctor!" Tonto jumped on his horse and rode... read more