My nephew's first words were, "I'm a firestarter".

He was a child prodigy.

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A child prodigy

A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in 3rd grade. The boy said, "Madam, I should be in 4th grade. I am smarter than my sister and she's in grade 4".

The teacher had heard enough and took the boy to the principal's office. The principal decided to test the boy w...

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A kid is a painting prodigy.

He draws a 100 dollar bill on the floor of the classroom; his teacher breaks her nails trying to pick it up, and calls his father.

In the parent teacher meeting she complains from the kid and explains what happened, the father replies:
"You got lucky! at home he drew a vagina on the power ...

When a musician's fingers move really fast across a piano, they're considered a prodigy and a genius.

But when i go even faster on full-screen rhythm games on my iPad, I'm "lazy", "going to get carpal tunnel syndrome", "unproductive", and "ruining the funeral, Emily".

I'm leading the singing at Keith from the Prodigy's funeral

I'm the choir starter

There once was hippo child prodigy.

Just by hanging around tourists, he learned to talk, and soon thereafter to read.

Eventually, he started attending a nearby primary school for humans and he turned out to be very very smart indeed, even by human standards. Typing, thanks to his symbiotic oxpecker buddy, made him a prolific au...

My six year old niece made up this joke. I think she may be a comedic prodigy.

Why did the sweater go to boot camp?


To warm up!

Why don't I play chess with the Prodigy?

they smack my bishop

The college basketball team at Indiana University had just finished their worst season in school history.

The head coach, Bob, knew the team needed a different approach next year.

In the off season, Bob was driving around town when he saw a panhandler at a stoplight, and realized that this panhandler was around college age, and looked close to 7 feet tall. Bob stopped his car to talk to him and ...

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There is a store in Spain that sells exquisite handmade writing instruments.

This store has all kinds of bespoke fountain pens and rollerball pens and even ball point pens. There are pens made of fine hard woods and precious metals inlaid with all kinds of gems. These pens are all handmade by artisans who have been in the business for generations.

But what really sets...

In the City of Loafington, there lived a superhero named Wonderbread.

Wonderbread was, predictably, a superhero with bread-themed powers. He could beat up a gang with a baguette, trap someone in a giant pita, or cushion someone's fall with swiftly-rising dough. He was beloved by all in the city, for his escapades had the lovely side-effect of feeding the entire city f...

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The year: 2029. A brilliant scientist is constructing the first sentient artificial intelligence.

He's working out of his garage in San Francisco, living on charitable donations from his worried friends. He dropped out of college when he realized he could change the world — there's no going back; his life is dedicated to this project. At first, he is met with failure upon failure. But then, he r...

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Straight out of Popbitch...

You know I was invited to Keith Flint's (from the Prodigy) funeral? I'm supposed to lead the singing.



I'm the choir starter.

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A Boy Genius and his Frog

A man is driving his car down a country road. The weather is horrible outside. Suddenly he hears a loud pop and his car begins to veer wildly. He gets out of the car in the pouring rain to see that one of his wheels has popped off because all of the nuts holding it in have cracked and broken. He has...

Warning: Dad humor following.

John was so proud of his son for being the first one from their town to ever go to college. At the mill John would brag, "My boy is the smartest this town has ever seen!"

The boy returned after his first semester from college. The town gathered amazed at the boy prodigy. "Go on, son, tell 'e...

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