A man from Prague and his friend were playing chess at a restaurant when an Australian waiter interrupts their game.

The waiter says, "have a check, mate. Your Czech mate is about to be in check mate... oh, and here's the cheque, mate."

Prague just installed new Covid-19 testing stations.

They named them Czech points.

I have a friend from Prague who I play chess with.

He is my Czech mate.

If God isn't real, how do you explain how an average joe like me could marry a beautiful woman from Prague?

Czech mate, atheists

What do they call an abortion in Prague?

A cancelled Czech

If a knight in Prague dons his armour

Does that mean the czech is in the mail!?

What happened when the Prague Skydiving club couldn't afford proper equipment?

Their Czechs bounced.

What is the most popular snack in Prague?

Czech’s Mix

How do people in Prague pay their bills every month?

They pay by Czech

cats

There's a new dating app for cats in Prague...

it's called Czech Meowt

A Czech joke translation

Since we're all translating jokes, this is one I heard when I lived in Prague. FYI, it was a big hit when I told it in Sweden using Norway as the other country.

So an incredibly nefarious criminal escapes from prison in the Czech Republic. Rumor is he went across the border to Slovakia. So th...

I started a trampoline business in Prague. Business is good...

But the Czechs keep bouncing

Why do citizens of Prague rarely get scammed?

Because they always double Czech

Where do people from Prague deposit their money?

Into their Czeching account

How do people in Prague solve Algebra equations?

Guess and Czech.

I can never remember where Prague is...

I always have to Czech.

How does the Prague mafia mark its territory?

With a Czech mark

How do you describe your buddy who was Born in Prague but lives with you in Australia?

Czech Mate

A friend of mine opened a trampoline business in Prague.

I asked him how sales were and said "Well, the Czechs keep bouncing."

While in Prague I drove by the maximum security prison. It made me feel uneasy...

I never like passing bad Czechs.

Did you hear about the guy from Prague wearing armor?

The Czech's in the mail.

Why did the Founding Fathers hire accountants from Prague?

They needed a system of Czechs and balances.

My friend from Prague is a writer.

He likes to use Spellczech.

Did you hear about the guy who was caught hiding illegal immigrants in Prague?

He got prison for caching false Czechs.

Yesterday I met my friend from Slovakia.

He had just opened up a trampoline park near the border there, yet he seemed saddened by something when I walked in. He looked up at me with tired eyes so I asked him what was wrong:

‘What’s the matter?’ I asked. ‘There are many people here, surely business is doing well?’

He replie...

When flying to Prague...

...all of your bags are Czeched

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The most effective way to commit suicide;

Step 1: Move to the Czech Republic

Step 2: Run for office

Step 3: Implement policies that piss off the majority of the population

Step 4: Go to the top floor of a building in Prague

Step 5: Wait

A magician is traveling through Europe performing his flashy new fountain-pen act

He sells out shows in Paris, London, Berlin, Prague, and Amsterdam. People begin calling him "Bic Jesus"

Everywhere he went, crowds would gather to see him perform his Montblanc mastery. Men wanted to be him, and women wanted to be with him.

This all changed one fateful spring day. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Moshe is looking to go on holiday by himself...

He decides to go to Prague and sees a brochure for a tour of the Bohemian Forest. He arrives and gets his own personal tour guide. As they are hiking through the forest, they come across two large black bears. The guide tells him to be quiet and not move and the bears should be on their way. Mos...

A man was brought to the FBI on suspicion of murder

A man was brought to the FBI on suspicion of murder. He argued that there was no way he could have done it, as he was in vacation in Prague for the week of the killing. The FBI took note of his travel records and let him go; his alibi czeched out.

I went to go see Kafkaesque last night...

They’re a new Prague Rock band, you should Czech them out

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A customs agent stopped Sam, an elderly Jewish man who had just immigrated to Israel and asked him to open his two suitcases.

In the first suitcase, the agent found over 1 million pounds in £10 notes. "Excuse me, sir" he asked Sam, "where did you get all this money?"
"Vell, I'll tell you," Sam began, "I love Israel. For many years I travelled all around the world and stopped off at all of the public toilets in all the ...

My wife says I'm obsessed with terms of regulation

To prove her wrong I went on a yoga holiday in Prague.
It was a series of Czechs and balances.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Czech one: God is carrying a bag of dicks...

...when he suddenly trips over a rock and all the dicks fall out. He gets pissed off: "I'm not going to pick them up, Prague's going to be here!"

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