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Budapest Jokes

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Why did the Nazi fräulein move to Budapest?

She heard there were hung Aryans.

Two cannibals are eating a guy from Budapest and a guy from Helsinki.

One turns to the other and says are you still hungary? He replies no I'm finished.

My wife baked me a cake and I told her I was sending it to Budapest.

She asked why Budapest.

I said I'd renamed my stomach Budapest

She asked why again

Because Budapest is the capital of Hungry.

She is divorcing me.

I didn’t find the food in Budapest very filling,

so I left Hungary.

Do you know why I named my stomach "Budapest"?

Because it is the Capital of Hungary!

If you know anyone called Gary, warn them to not go to Budapest

I hear that's where they Hungary.

How do they kill unwanted insects in the Hungarian capital?

With Budapesticide.

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So these Americans are in Budapest and they notice all the Germans looking for prostitutes

So these two americans are in budapest and they notice how it's all germans looking to hire prostitutes
And one of the americans says "these germans are into some weird stuff, that guy over there probably paid some poor hungarian girl 30 euros to take a shit on her chest"
And the german t...

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A Hungarian cockroach was telling terrible jokes at an open mic night. What do you do?

Budapest

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A talmudist goes to Moscow...

After months of negotiation with the authorities, a Talmudist
from Odessa was finally granted permission to visit Moscow.

He boarded the train and found an empty seat. At the next stop,
a young man got on and sat next to him. The scholar looked at the young
man and he thought: This f...

I told a joke during tech sound setup: "There were two European tourists walking down the street. One was from Budapest."

"There was a Czech one, too."

Where did the annoying prophet go on vacation?

Budapest!

In India rats are celebrated...

but in Hungary they Budapest.

What do you call a Buddhist that got reincarnated as an insect?

A Budapest

A Hungarian and an American were having lunch.

The Hungarian asks his friend, "My family lets the flies come in and pollinate our flowers. Yours doesn't? You don't think of them as something needed to keep nature in balance?"

The American replies, "No, Budapest."

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Some translated Italian jokes on the European immigrant crisis

Venezuela offers refuge to 20k immigrants. *Now I want to see how you even get here.*

France suggests bombing Syria. To drive out the last refugees.

Clashes on the border between Hungary and Serbia. If I were an Austrian archduke, I would stay home.

Merkel: "Refugees will change...

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