What do you call a Parisian who enjoys canning cucumbers?

A French Pickler.

Ever hear about that small chicken that inhabited a Parisian opera house?

It was called the bantam of the opera!

Do you know why Parisians only have a single egg for breakfast?

Because in France one egg is un œuf.

What'd the Parisian chef say when he messed up his Pancakes?

"Aww Crepe."

How do the Parisians prefer to get their news and coffee

The French Press

Parisian vacation

A woman took a vacation to France some years ago with one of her girl- friends. Her husband drove her to the airport and wished her a good trip. The wife asked, "Would you like me to bring something
back for you?"

The husband laughed and says, "How about a French girl!"

The woman ke...

The Furniture Dealer

Murphy, a furniture dealer from Dublin, decided to expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris to see what he could find.

After arriving in Paris, he visited some manufacturers and selected a line that he thought would sell well back home.

To celebrate the ...

France

Did you hear about the psychotic Parisian who jumped into the river?
Apparently he was in Seine

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once, there was a French battle pilot, named Jean-Pierre

(I recommend reading the joke in a heavy French accent)

After the war, Jean-Pierre returned to live in Paris, above a local pub.

One night, he noticed a gorgeous blonde Parisian and went to flirt with her, which went well.

After a while of flirting, the blonde told Jean-Pierre,...

After Quasimodo died, Notre Dame Cathedral needed a replacement bell ringer, and after several fruitless months a strange little man approaches one of the priests...

"I'd like the bell ringer job if it's still available." says the man. Confused, the priest says "Of course, but I'm afraid there might be some confusion. I can't help but notice that you don't have any arms, so ringing the bells would be quite impossible." The little man smiles and says "I come from...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

French, Italian and Russian are talking about their sex lives

French says: "When I get down with my woman, I can get her satisfied. I just slowly undress her latest Parisian fashion garments, and softly whisper of all the dirty things I will do to her. When I get going, she screams all night."

Italian replies: "That's nothing. When my lady and I start t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My grandfather was a WWII vet...

He said he went to Paris back in the day, and went into this lounge called "Les Jardin Rois" got drunk and pissed on the bar, banged all the waitresses, beat up the bouncer and threw a chair through the front window.
Naturally, I went there on vacation one year and tried the same shit, got my a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Gerrard and the nudist beach

Gerrard, a young Parisian stud, books himself a couple of weeks at a coastal nudist colony to work on the tan (and the ladies) but on his first day he realises his member looks like a milk bottle compared to the rest of his tanned, toned body - he doesn't believe in sunbeds and you can't exactly bat...

What do you get if you cross Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Phillip?

Killed in a Parisian tunnel.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.