One Direction Jokes - 26 Hilarious One Direction Jokes

Did you know there's a street in England named Harry Styles Boulevard?

It only goes in one direction, though.

What were four members of One Direction doing in the wig shop?

They were looking for hairy styles.

One direction have gone their seperate ways,

Isn’t that ironic!

Kanye joins One Direction as a replacement for Zayn...

He kicks everyone out of the band and says: "If there's only one direction, it's West."

I rate the next One Direction album...

...four out of five stars.

Zayn leaving one direction is just like putting a fork into a sausage..

It leaves four little pricks.

Why does listening to One Direction make people age more quickly?

It makes you go see Niall.

My life has no meaning, the only thing that brings me joy is listening to my favorite member of One Direction.

I guess you could call me a nihilist

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man has problems with urinating in one direction

This gentlemen was in a frightful state, bursting into the public lavatory sweating and groaning. Desperate to have a pee, he stands in the middle cubicle between two guys and let’s rip. The pee flies everywhere, up the walls, onto his shoes and all over the other guys who are disgusted and run out ...

I hate One Direction fans...

Oscillating ones cool down a room much better.

How did the band One Direction get it's name?

Because when they're running the trainbang they're all facing... one direction.

What's the difference between one direction and futurama

There's only one bender in futurama

So I asked my friend who is a flat Earther to keep walking in one direction...

I don’t know where he is now, but I know one thing: Best case scenario, one less flat Earther. Worst case scenario: one less flat Earther.

Why do koi fish travel in groups of four?

To protect the group from predators. When attacked, kois A, B, and C will go in one direction. The fourth one is the D koi.

I can't write jokes, but a friend of mine gave me a foolproof formula. He said "Start with a natural set-up, lead the audience in one direction, then hit them with a punch line they weren't expecting."

So here goes:

Walk forwards.

Turn left.

Pasteurization.

One Direction broke up

Everything was just going south.

My friend who’s father is a multi-billionaire

My friend whose father is a multi-billionaire loves to talk about his extravagant lifestyle. One day, I asked him just exactly how large is the land owned by his father.
He answered “I’ll give you an idea, I can start driving at one end of the land in the morning at full speed, in one direction...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Job advertisement

A company was searching for someone to pack items. The only requirement for the job was to be able to count to ten.

The first applicant comes in and is asked to count to ten.

>10 - 9 - 8 - 7 - 6 - 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1

Well, that's backwards. Can you also do it in the correct ord...

I can't believe there's a band named after diode flow...

One Direction

Bob Seger sits in a park with a tired-eyed old man. He's learning how to play chess.

After going over the layout and setup of the board, the old man begins a lesson on to the movement of the individual pieces.

Queens move in all directions, any distance. Kings are the same but with only one space. He didn't understand the knight, though.

Two in one direction, then ...

It’s nice to see that celebrities have taken up book writing during the pandemic

One Direction by Kanye West

Guitars by Mel Gibson

Mining by Brad Pitt

Pear Cider by Katy Perry

Ship Building by Tom Cruise

How to Move Things by Jim Carrey

Escape from Prison by Morgan Freeman

American Motors by Harrison Ford

Wild Animals by Wi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm 17 and I like to write jokes in my spare time. Thought reddit might like to hear some.

I think blonde jokes are awful. I mean, the poor things don't even understand them.

So I got this pair of shoes that cost me an arm and a leg. Luckily, my mom still pays for everything.

Statistics have shown that 9 out of 11 people are offended by this joke.

I've yet to be dispr...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A drunk man killed 25 driving his truck

While being persecuted, the judge asked: "Why did you drove over that many people knowing there was another road you could've diverted to?"

"Okay, hear me out" the driver said, "if you were driving a truck, and you were faced with a fork in the road; one direction has 24 people on it, and ano...

So I just fell down the stairs holding a guitar...

and accidentally wrote a One Direction song.

Love it how music can take you to another place .

For example, One direction is playing in this restaurant so i'm going to a different one.

I had a broken vacuum...

then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.

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