Three Helium molecules walk into a bar

The bartender asks, "what's so funny?"

Anybody here heard of Molecules?

He’s the smallest of the Greek heroes!

What did the scientist say when he mixed 2oxygen molecules with Yttrium, Boron, and Hydrogen

OH BOY

A fish made from two sodium molecules

Two-Na

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What kind of sex are molecules into?

Bondage.

What has 6.022 x 10^23 molecules and makes a great breakfast?

Avogadro toast

My friend is weak in differentiating organic molecules

He says they are all alkene.

Some words sounding similar can be confusing. For example, Entropy and Atrophy.

Entropy is simply a measure of how much the energy of atoms and molecules become more spread out in a process and can be defined in terms of statistical probabilities, whereas Atrophy, is what you get if you win something.

Why did the 22140857×10^23 molecules of Methyl Acetate go to jail?

It was a Mole-Ester!

Do you know why all the O2 molecules are intelligent?

Because an stupid one would be an Oxy-Moron.

Two Molecules are Talking to Each Other...

The first one asks, "Why don't you like me?"

The water molecule says, "I'm sorry, but I'm just not that attracted to you."

The other cries, "Is it because I'm fat?!"

Where do molecules go when they're misaligned?

The chiralpractor!

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A scientist walks into a bar and sees a depressed man.

"What's wrong?" says the scientist.

"I have nothing to live for," the man replies miserably. "I'm an absolute nobody. I don't have anything to offer the world. I'm completely unspecial and just another average Joe. I don't even know why I'm here. What's the point? What's my purpose?"

T...

What do you get when you cross a blind burrowing mammal with a Roman demigod?

Molecules

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Why Don't Jews Like Ions?

They prefer their molecules free of charge.

my 14 year old came back with this after his biology class

Q. who was the Jewish prophet that led the water molecules across the partially permeable membrane?
A. osmoses

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Little Johnny joke

Teacher was going over words in class, and asked her students to use definitely in a sentence. Little Johnny was squirming, so he called out, "Teacher, I need to go take a shit!" She told him to sit down. "You can't go to the bathroom until you have used definitely in a sentence."

He thought...

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