What begins with “M” and ends in “arriage” and is a mans favorite thing?

A miscarriage
That Joke never gets old just like the baby

Do you know why most miscarriage jokes are bad?

They fail at the delivery

My girlfriend was crying after she had a miscarriage...

I said, "don't worry hunny, at least it was still born..."

Jokes about miscarriages...

Sometimes you just gotta get em out of your system.

So, wanna hear a miscarriage joke?

Never mind, I lost it...

Money makes every thing...

A girl missed her period 2 months ago,her mom
took her to the clinic for pregnancy test of which
it was positive.Embarrased, her mom said; who
is the pig that got you pregnant? The girl picked
up her phone and made a call, an hour later,a
young handsome man drove in Ferrari to the
...

[nsfw] I knew a girl who had a miscarriage while taking a shower

It was the worst baby shower ever

I was absolutely distraught when my girlfriend told me she'd had a miscarriage.

I had to leave the pub and go to the hospital.

I told a miscarriage joke to my mate yesterday

but I couldn't deliver it right.

What's the worst thing about your girlfriend having a miscarriage?

Trying to look upset.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why is a miscarriage like a shitty pizza?

They're both cold upon delivery.

Abortion humor everybody: Texas (and Indiana) tried to pass law that said miscarriages/abortions had to have burials. Listen to what that plan sounds like:

Flush.

Hear the one about the miscarriage?

I overheard it yesterday. The joke was funny but the delivery was all wrong

What do you say to a Female comedian who has just had a miscarriage?

"You should work on your delivery".

Where do trailer park miscarriages go?

Out of the trash and into the garbage

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An 18 year old Italian girl tells her mom that she has missed her period for two months.

Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Fer...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At a Sunday family lunch, a daughter, good student aged 20, announces that she is pregnant.

Father drops the fork and knife in shock. Mother looks at her in total disbelief. None of them are able to say a word for couple of seconds, before yelling starts... What was she thinking about? Of course she does not plan to keep it? They invested so much in her education, how could she do this? Wh...

I called my son a bloody disappointment and my girlfriend burst out into tears

Appartently, she's sensitive about her miscarriage

There was a group of troubled teenagers bored in a small town.

There was a group of troubled teenagers who were bored in a small town. They egged their neighbor's house, TPed the one down the road, and just generally caused mischief but they were running out of original ideas to keep it fresh.

One of them decided to go down to the expressway overpass and...

I once lived on a street named Prescott avenue...

And my neighboirs had a miscarriage with their already named baby Scott. So they painted over the pre in Prescott and wrote Postscott. Everyone thought they murdered him so there was a police investigation, and they got off Scott free...

“I’m the youngest failure.”

“I’m the youngest failure”, I say.

“Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure a miscarriage is the youngest failure a person can be.”

When the teenage daughter has been knocked up.

A teenage girl goes to her mother and tells her that she is pregnant. The mother is outraged by this news.

"Who is this scumbag who has done this to you? I demand to know who it is!"

The girl calls the father-to-be. 30 minutes later, a fancy limousine parks next to the house and a dis...

What do you call a stroller with a dead Baby in it?

A miscarriage.

My girlfriend keeps saying she's "still got it"...

Also, she doesn't like me asking if she's had a miscarriage

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A girl tells her parents she's pregnant

A girl tells her parents she's pregnant. The Mom goes ape shit and says "you call that bastard over here right now!".

Later that evening a distinguished gentleman in his 40's arrives in a Lamborghini. He gets out of the car and approaches the girl's parents who are understandably furious....

My sister and her husband live next to a bunch of cell phone towers, and they're concerned it’s going to affect the health of their children.

*If* they can stop having miscarriages.

Whats big, pink, long and my girlfriend hates when I put it in her mouth?

Our miscarriage.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A rich man impregnates his girlfriend

A rich man impregnates his girlfriend, and this angers her father. To set everything right, the father invites her boyfriend over. The man arrives in a Lamborghini and steps out in a Stuart Hughes suit, and then walks into the house.

"Is this the pig that got my daughter pregnant?" The fathe...

What do you call it when a future serial killer's mom has an abortion.

A miscarriage of justice

A woman has an affair..

A few weeks go by and the woman realizes she is late on her period. So she calls the man over to her house to discuss the issue.

"How could you let this happen?? If I have a child from you, you're going to provide for it!" The woman says.

"Of course, of course," the man replied. "If ...

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