Marked Jokes - 14 Hilarious Marked Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Boy asks, "Granny, have u seen my pills, they're marked LSD"

Granny replies, "Fuck the pills, have u seen the dragon in the kitchen?!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The teacher looked disappointed, as she handed back my F-marked exam sheet.

"That is possibly the worst English paper I have ever tried to read." She scolded. "Have you anything to say for yourself?"

"Just two words, miss," I replied. "Go fuck yourself."

I'm shit at maths, too.

The troubles of foreigners in Canada

A patron in a Montreal restaurant turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded.

"This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked 'C' gave me boiling water."

"But, Monsieur, 'C' stands for chaud – French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."

"Wait a...

As the teacher marked my quiz answers, she said, "This is wrong."

"Question 2 ?" I asked.

"No, the way your hand is resting between my thighs."

Do you know why “Chicken Run” was as an marked explicit movie?

It has fowl language

Eve eating the apple marked..

.. the first time when Artificial Intelligence got out of its creator's control.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The front page should be marked as NSFW

With all these senator assholes popping up I might as well be on a porn site

In 7th grade we had a quiz where we were asked "what did France set up during the French Revolution." They marked me wrong and I'm still a little upset about it.

I still maintain "tons and tons of guillotines" is a correct answer

Everyone in the senior class of ninja school was marked absent today.

They all got an A+

I was having trouble leaving the building as the ways out were not clearly marked.

It was a true exit stencil crisis.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Long but gold, Couldn’t find it posted before. Marked NSFW for swearing. But how on earth this man gunna get broccoli??

There’s a grocery store, with a giant sign first thing in the doors that says “no broccoli”.

A man walks into this grocery store, walks up to the counter and says “hey man, you got any broccoli?”
The cashier looks at him and says “nah man we have no broccoli, sign out front says no brocco...

Larry, the clumsy carpenter, was using his tablesaw and leaned in close to check he was following the line he had marked on the plank.

ZANNGGG! His left ear gets neatly severed, tumbles through the air and lands in the pile of sawdust.

Screaming in pain and panic, Larry drops to the ground, one hand pressed against his head and the other sifting through the sawdust.

Joe, hearing the commotion, races over to help. When...

The fourth Harry Potter book marked a huge tone shift for the rest of the series.

I mean, the fifth book was dead serious.

A blonde walks into a bar that has a sign marked: "For Men Only". "I'm sorry, ma'am," says the bartender. "We only serve men in this place."

"That's OK, " says the blonde. "I'll take two of them..."

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