A piece of rope walks into a bar.

After very inappropriate behaviour, the bartender asks the rope to leave.

The rope leaves and gives itself a makeover by unravelling himself at the top and tying himself into a knot.

It returns the next day and the bartender asks “Aren’t you the same guy yesterday?”

It says: “I’...

A woman steps in front of a bus and dies instantly.

She finds herself at the pearly gates, being greeted by God himself.



He looks the woman up and down, and says "Hm... Strange. It's not your time! I'm sending you back."

"Sending me back? How long until it IS my time?" she asks.

"Worry not, my child. You have many, many m...

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A woman visited an Amazonian tribe on a research trip...

She spent several days taking notes on the lifestyle and habits of the tribe and interviewing their ruler, King Paolo, via an interpreter. As the tribe's land was near several rich gold mines, the king and his people were extremely wealthy.

During the woman's time with him, the king fell hop...

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There was a man who had three girlfriends, but he did not know which one to marry. So he decided to give each one $5000 and see how each of them spent it.

The first one went out and got a total makeover with the money. She got new clothes, a new hairdo, manicure, pedicure, the works, and tells the man. "I spent the money so I could look pretty for you because I love you so much."

The second one went out and bought new golf clubs, a CD player, a...

What do you call a vampire getting a makeover?

Re-vamping.

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A man is deciding between three women, which to be with. He tests them by giving them each $5000 to see what they each do with the money.

The first woman got a complete spa treatment and makeover to make herself look good for the man. The second woman took her $5000 and bought the man gifts, gadgets and trinkets he’d like to make him happy. The third woman invested the money, made a hefty return on it, and paid back the man his $5000....

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A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money

The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup; buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

The man was impressed.
...

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Typical Men

There onced lived a rich man who wanted desperately to get married. So in order to determine a suitable wife he selected 3 women who he found attractive and gave them each $10000 to do as they please. The first woman spent her $10000 on a makeover and went to the man. She said "i spent the money on ...

The blond one

There was a typical blonde. She had long, blonde hair, blue eyes, and she was sick of all the blonde jokes.

One day, she decided to get a makeover, so she cut and dyed her hair. She also went out and bought a new convertible. She went driving down a country road and came across a herd of shee...

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Decision Time

A man who had been seeing three different women decided it was time to settle down and get married. The problem was, he couldn't decide which woman to ask to marry him. Then he had an idea: he'd give $1,000 to each of them and whatever they did with the money would influence his decision.

S...

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