Where do evergreens search for Christmas decorating tips?

Pine-terist

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I decided to brighten my neighborhood by decorating my boundary wall with dildos

My neighbour is livid but his wife is still on the fence

Fewer people are decorating eggs these days ...

It’s a dyeing art.

Everyone likes decorating the Christmas tree, but taking it down confuses me...

It's really disornamenting

A father was decorating the Christmas tree with his son. The boy says:

"Dad can't we use tinsel like everyone else? This is really uncomfortable."

Did you hear about the old couple that passed away decorating Easter eggs?

They dyed happily.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I started a business decorating turds.

It was pretty shit.

One November night, a man suggests a Christmas movie when trying to choose something to watch with his wife.

"We can't watch that," says the wife. "We have to wait until December." The husband agrees to this, so they watch something else.

Several months later, in the middle of Summer, the wife sees something that reminds her of an event from her past. "Wanna hear something funny that happened when I...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

For community service I was ordered to go help out at an old folks home...

I met a nurse who told me about the old man I was going to be helping out with.


She told me that he had had a stroke a few years back and could only say one word. She tasked me with getting him to say at least two words by the end of my time there.


I thought it would be an inte...

Put to good use..

I have a friend who's a pilot for EasyJet.
But, because of this lockdown, he's off work,
So l asked him if he fancied doing a bit of decorating for me while he's at a loose end, and he jumped at the chance.
l must say, he made a lovely job of the landing.

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