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What else could he say??

A young couple decided to take their 5 year old son to see the circus. After several amazing acts, the ringmaster led six bull elephants into the center ring, linked trunk to tail in the usual manner.

"What's that big thing hanging off the elephant, Mommy?" Little Johnny asked.

"That...

Several years ago, a group of artistic polymaths decided to mathematically represent different styles of painting.

Several years ago, a group of artistic polymaths decided to mathematically represent different styles of painting.

Each of the polymaths was a leading figure in a different field of mathematics, and each pursued and studied a different style of painting. Together, they decided that if they co...

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Warning! If you receive an email with a link called 'free porn' don't open it.

It is a flocking birus wich deactivates your spelchek and garblis up you riting. I also receibed it but lukily I dont does porn so I dint opin it

I asked my Magic 8 Ball if linking my Gmail messages to my Microsoft email client would be a good idea.

"Outlook not so good"

I’m thinking of starting a band with some guys I met online

We’re gonna call ourselves LinkedIn Park

A smoothie bar serving combined fruit and vegetable drinks has been linked to bouts of depression and suicide...

Their "Melon-Cauli" smoothie has now been withdrawn...

Why are libraries always the tallest buildings

Because they have thousands of stories

(If this has been made before, please comment a link to it an I will delete this post, or just say it and I might, but a link would be appreciated :) )

A newly released Harvard study links NFL head trauma to erectile dysfunction...

The players could sue but I dont think it would stand up in court.

What do Link and Tony Stark have in common?

They're both smashing pots

Which US president was the first to embrace professional social networks?

Abraham LinkedIn

What did Zelda suggest to Link when diplomacy didn't work?

Try-force

There is no link between violence and video games...

But there is a link between violence and lag.

I've heard that "Never gonna give you up" is a great song.

But everytime I'm asking for a link I'm just getting rickrolled...

Soviet joke request

I remember a joke on quora somewhere from a Russian guy about the cold war, but I cant seem to remember it right or find the joke. I can only remember that the joke went something like this: American scientists build a machine that can answer any question. During a test trial they ask it a series of...

I need a new bicycle chain.

Can anyone give me any links?

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Two hobos with a sausage walk into a bar.

First one tells the other,

"Let's order a ton of food and drinks. Once we're drunk, I'll whip out this sausage link, and you go under the table and start sucking this thing. When security sees what we're doing, they'll have no choice but to kick us out before we pay."

For the next cou...

2 MEN DIED LAST WEEK PLAYING ZELDA GAMES

I think there might be a Link between them

One day TV is broadcasting about a gun shot in campus and the experts analyze that it is linked to the murder's massive time in playing violence video game.

Mum: No sense, my son is always playing dating sims and he still unable to find a girlfriend.

Irish Vs. English

An English naval vessel is called to attention by an Irish Guard.

Irish: Aye, approaching vessel, I advise ye turn 15 degrees south to avoid a collision.

The English Captain replies: "Negative, sir. We advise you redirect 15 degrees north to avoid said collision."

Irish: I repea...

Why does Ganondorf hate the internet?

Because there's too many links.

A man orders soup at the restaraunt, but as soon as it arrives, it becomes apparent something is very wrong with his meal.

He flags down his waiter.

"Excuse me waiter, could you please taste my soup?"

The waiter gives the man a strange look.

"Is something wrong with your soup, sir?"

The man shakes his head,

"Please taste the soup, waiter."

The waiter gets flustered, he told the ...

Two men are playing golf

Two men are hitting the links one day when they realize that they are approaching a pair of women players ahead of them. Realizing that they need to observe proper etiquette, the first man starts to walk down the green to ask if they can play through.

About half way down the green, the first...

A patient went to a doctor

A doctor accidentally prescribes him a laxative instead of a coughing syrup. - Three days later the patient comes for a check-up and the doctor asks: “Well? Are you still coughing?” - The patient replies: “No. I’m afraid to.” - NOTE: A lot of creative work went into our website. Do not copy text wi...

There are 500 bricks on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

.
499.

How do you put an elephant into a fridge?

Open door. Insert elephant. Close door.

How do you put a giraffe into a fridge?

Open door. Remove elephant. Insert giraffe. Close door.

The lion king is having a birthday party. Two animals are missing. Who are ...

Recently I was playing Zelda on the SNES

It really was a link to the past.

I heard a rumor that the next Legend of Zelda game is to be set in a Hyrule version of Spain. No one believes me

They don’t expect a Spanish Link decision

Friend of mine sends me a link to a reposted joke on r/Jokes

I say : "No thanks, I've already Reddit."

What was the ancient language Link needed a book to translate in "A Link to the Past"?

Hyruleglyphics.

Spent six hours linking all of my watches together to make a belt

It was a complete waist of time

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They say a man's penis is linked to the size of the car he has... I've got a mini

That's why I drive a very big car

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Is it the first line or the punchline that goes here?

In the days of the wild west, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the fastest gunfighter in the world.

He practiced every minute of his spare time, but he knew that he wasn't yet first-rate and that there must be something he was doing wrong.

Sitting in a saloo...

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Why will people click on any link with sperm or eggs in the headline?

Hey, sex cells.

Do you know what happens when you click a link without knowing what it is?

Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

How would Hyrule be called if it had been Link who created the kingdom?

HYAAAArule.

....

Yeah that was bad....

What did Zelda say to link, when he couldn't open the door?

"Triforce."

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A university professor was giving a lecture to a group of men on the link between sex and happiness.

To illustrate an example, he asked the men who have sex daily to stand up. A number of men stood up, smiling and high fiving each other.

Then he asked the men who have sex once a week to stand up. Again, a group of them stood up, but only with a faint smile on their faces.

Taking it fu...

I saw a Dwarf who had escaped from prison climbing over a chain link fence. As he was climbing down the other side he scowled and stuck his tongue out at me and ran away...

I said to myself "That was a little condescending"

Why does the Norway Navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian!

Edit: whoops I meant Norwegian Navy

Edit 2: Thanks to commenters I have links to other people who have posted this joke! I haven’t been around very long so I didn’t know, go give them an upvote as well if you’d like!

2015:...

What's the most-clicked link on the Alzheimer's support website?

Forgot Your Password?

TIFU by clicking on a link that read "Click to see something unexpected!"

Spanish Inquisition.

To his great surprise, Bob won the largest lottery in history.

Unsure what to do with his newfound fortune, he decided to build the world's biggest ship. It was 10 miles long and 3 miles wide; a floating city. Once the ship was complete, Bob had to hire thousands of people to work on it and make it run properly. He held mass interviews and hired sailors, police...

If someone sends you a link to download the Homer's Iliad, don't download it...

It's full of trojans!!

Sidebar the Numbered Jokes joke, start linking reposts and numbering them

For science

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