A guy comes up to White River Junction in Vermont...

The sign says “White River 2M” and “White River 2M”. Confused by the sign, he finds a local and asks,

“What difference does it make if I take the left or the right?”

The Vermonter says, “Not to me it don’t.”

There was a pile up on Spaghetti Junction today.

Reports say that 4 people were injured and 3 pasta way.

Two elderly women were out driving

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car - both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to major crossroad. The stop light was red, but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it. I could have...

A banker died. When he arrived at the junction between heaven and hell, God gave him a choice between the two. The banker decided to take a tour.

He toured heaven. It was calm, serene and comfortable. Then he toured hell. There were nightclubs, endless bars, girls all around and loud music. He obviously chose the hell.

When he entered hell, there were fireballs, demons spitting java and not a pickle to eat. He turned to God and asked ...

A man is driving around the city when he comes to a junction where a railroad and the street intersect.

Seeing a woman texting on the other side, he decides to get out of his car and stand on the tracks.

There's a rumble and a train is heard in the distance.

"Shouldn't you get off there?" the woman asks, bemused at his stupidity.

The man decides to impress her by ducking out at th...

Lada breaks down on the autobahn...

... Driver gets out only to see someone pull up in a Porsche Cayenne. Cayenne driver asks him does he need a tow. Lada driver replies with a "Yes. I will turn my right blinker on to tell you that you are going too fast." After a few hundred meters, a person in a Lamborghini Urus speeds by.

Po...

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Two homosexuals bumped into each other one day in Bondi Junction.

After their customary intimate greeting, one of them asked the other, "Fabian, have you stopped smoking?"

When Fabian replied in the affirmative, his chum asked him how he had managed to kick the habit.

Explained Fabian, "It was easy really. Everytime I felt like a cigarette, I`d just...

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#372: A man sees a beautiful woman trying to hitch a lift.

He pulls over, and asks her where she was heading.

She didn't respond vocally, but signalled that she was hard of hearing and to go straight.

Following the road, the guy then comes to a stop at T-junction, which had a lake behind it. Since he didn't know any sign language, he mouthed t...

Turn where?

This really happened to me.

I was a driver in the Army and in one of the journey, an officer is sitting beside me looking at some notes.

When approaching a T junction, I asked "Turn left?"

Officer : "Right."

I then proceed to turn left.

After he sense I have made a...

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So there was this recently separated guy...

So there was this recently separated good looking guy, he was just driving to the movies to watch a film that he’d been waiting to see for ages. Anyhow, as he crosses a junction in the road a car came flying out and t-boned him good. ‘Christ sake’ he thought to himself, ‘I’m just getting over losing...

Help needed!

I need some advice on a pretty serious decision.

I've suspected for some time now that my girlfriend has been having an affair. There have been a few signs which I think I may be taking the wrong way and wouldn't like to falsely accuse her, but the number of these little warning flags keeps i...

Stop Means Stop (Long)

While on a business trip in Dublin from London, a young lawyer ran a stop sign and got pulled over. Having heard before that the Irish Police are not the cleverest bunch this lawyer thought to himself "This will be easy".
"Good evening officer, how can i help you today?" The Lawyer says politel...

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I didn't make this 4 years ago. This might not be the worst joke. I'm posting again for the ones who read the original by the original poster...this is my version to pay homage

There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-known porn star, and the other is a lazy ass. Lazy ass doesn't have a job and just likes to sit around the house. One Sunday, the porn star is angry and thirsty. He decides to make the brother do something useful....

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A Raunchy One!

A horny American is walking along Jalan Bukit Bintang, in Kuala Lumpur one night and a very gorgeous girl catches his eye.

He strikes up a conversation with her, and quickly discovers that she is one
of those "exclusive" ladies-of-the-trade.

"How much do you charge?", asks he....

Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

1990s Blonde joke

What’s the definition of eternity?

4 blondes at a 4 way stop junction

An old lady drives a car with with her friend sitting next to her.

The car crosses a junction on a red light. The friend looks worried but assumes it was a one-time mistake. When it happens on the next junction she is really worried and asks her friend: "Why do you keep crossing junctions on a red light?" The driver answers "OMG, it's me who is driving?".

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Highschool in a nutshell

Art: *draws dicks everywhere*

Biology: "mighty mitochondria... The powerhouse of the cell"

Chemistry: feelslikeamethlabman.jpg

English: "conjunction junction what's your function?"

Health: "here's STD-infected genitalia, now everybody take condoms"

History: *insert...

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