This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Professor X to JK Rowling:

Professor X: "What's your power?"

JK Rowling: "I can rewrite the past of fictional characters."

Gay Professor X: "Interesting."

What do you call a fake gun?

A JK-47

Why did the cannibal have a medieval peasant and JK Rowling over for dinner?

They wanted to eat serf and terf.

What do you call I fight between notch and jk Rowling?

A TERF war

Where do horses go when they get sick?

The horse-pital.

Lol jks, they get shot.

Why are communists always late to events?

Because they’re Stallin’!

JK. It’s cause they starved to death.

How does JK Rowling go down a hill?

Walking...




JK




Rolling

Where do you set your drinks when you have covid?

A coughey table.

My 3 year old just told me this. Jk, my adult brain made this dumb joke, hope it's not a repost.

What’s a Depressed persons favorite drink?

A Depresso Espresso

Jk it’s cyanide

How I accidentally crushed a vegan customer's soul at Subway ;-;

So I work at Subway, yesterday I had a chick come in, she told me she wanted a Veggie Delight. As I went to get the bread she asked me if I could change my gloves cause she was vegan and I had been handling meat. I did that, no problem, perfectly reasonable request. I get her bread, toast it and put...

Husband: My wife is missing. She went to rescue people from the flood yesterday and has not come home ...

Sergeant at Police Station:
What is her height?

Husband:
Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

Sergeant:
Weight?

Husband:
Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.

Sergeant:
Color of eyes?

Husband:
Sort of brown I think. Never really ...

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves.




Jk, he hasn’t opened it yet.

With most colleges going online now, nobody is laughing at University of Phoenix anymore

jk

TIL that the toilet seat was invented by the polish people and only after 5 years the American perfected it by adding the hole in the middle.

A rough translation of a jk my dad told me

My life

Jk, jokes have a meaning

I lost the 2 middle keys in my keyboard

jk

Where do horses go when they break their legs?

The HORSEpital hahahaha,



Jk they get shot

What did the air stewardess say after she made Abcde cry?

I JK

How many HK protesters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Trick Question: They can't change anything.

Jk dont take this seriously plz

My girlfriend passed me a check with baby animals on it and said "Its a fun check"

I told her it bounced due to "insufficient funs"





jk, I don't have a girlfriend

I remember doing security at the Brits a few years back when it all kicked off between Steps and Jamiroquai

I was the only thing between H and JK

A proton walks into a bar...

jk protons can't walk

Yesterday i said I would write two jokes

jokes jokes




Jk anti vaxers and flat Earth people

Why did the blind man fall down the well?

He couldn’t see that well!

Jk some kids pushed him

Something bad will happen at the end of A B C D E F G H...

I JK.

EA Sports™ - It's in the game.

jk its in the dlc

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm so gay

I'm so gay, JK Rowling actually just revealed I was straight all along

Ellen Pao is actually right and we should respect her decisions

^jk ^lol

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How does an elephant get in a tree?

A: By sitting on a sapling and waiting for the tree to grow underneath it.

Q: How does an elephant get down from a tree?

A: It sits on a leaf and waits for autumn.

Q: Why did the elephant fall from the tree?

A: It thought it was a leaf.

Q: Why did another elephant...

I just got married and I am scared of the statistics..

I'm not sure if I should be more worried about that 40-50% of marriages end in divorce or that 50-60% of all marriages last..

Jk honey, I love you. ^^^^^help

I'm actually a very close personal friend of the author of Harry Potter.

jk

The inventor of the Oxford Comma has died.

Tributes have been lead by JK Rowling, his wife and the Queen of England.

Breaking Celebrity News! Academy Award winning Actor, Simmons, and children's book Author, Rowling, eloped earlier today.

JK

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.