If there is Three types of people who I hate...

It's people who can't count

and hypocrites

People are hypocrites

My friend got called a hero for donating a kidney, but when I turn up to donate 10 they call me a monster!

Composers are such hypocrites

They compose when they are alive and decompose when they are dead!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My parents got mad at me for sleeping with the autistic girl next door.

I didn’t really want to, but they told me my first time should be with someone special.

Fucking hypocrites

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People can be such hypocrites

They always say girls hate nice guys, but I know a lot of dudes who want to fuck an asshole

Why do hypocrites avoid mixed metaphors?

The don't count their chickens in the same basket.

The Irish brothel

Three Irishmen are sitting in the pub window seat, watching the front door of the brothel over the road.
The local Methodist pastor appears and quickly goes inside.
"Would you look at that!" says the first Irishman, "Didn't I always say what a bunch of hypocrites they are?"
No sooner are...

There are 2 things I hate in this world: (1) People who put animal names in words...

...and (2) Hypocrites

I think hypocrisy is okay.

I hate hypocrites though.

"Dress for the job you want, not the job you have." --career advancement program at my job

Then they fired me for violating the dress code at the bank. Hypocrites. How am I ever going to become a sumo wrestler now?

I hate three kinds of people:

1. Critics
2. People who dont raed their jokes before posting
3. Hypocrites

Overcrowded church

The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church.

One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while th...

Three Irishmen were sitting in a pub, across the road from a brothel...

Three Irishmen were sitting in a pub across the road from the local brothel. As they watched through the window, they saw the Methodist minister creep up to the door of the brothel and slip inside.

"Ah, now - didn't I tell you? They're all a bunch of hypocrites, that lot. Such a shame, a man ...

If there is anything in this world i don't like

It's gingers, dyslexia, racists, and hypocrites.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Double standards

When a Woman gets a vibrator, its seen as a bit of naughty fun.

But when a guy orders a Fuckmaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with a non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built-in orgasmic scream surround sound system, he is cal...

I hate people who use stereotypes...

They're usually hypocrites.

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