This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Last week I almost got robbed in the desert...

The robber shot my tires when I was driving and pulled me straight out of the car. He yelled "GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY RIGHT NOW!"

I responded "Wait wait wait, before you do, can you shoot my hat? I wanna prove to my family at home I was robbed."

The robber shrugged as I took off my hat ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dying of dehydration

There are these three guys in a desert dying of dehydration. Off in the horizon they see a house and finally manage to struggle to it. The first guy goes up to the door to ask for water. The door is opened by this really old, wart-covered, puss covered, scaly, toothless old woman.

"C-c-c-can ...

I was telling my friend about the new guy at our office.

Me: He’s a complete wuss, we went to the store room together and on entering he screamed “oh my god, a mouse, get it away from me!!”

Friend: Well I can kind of understand that. Some people have genuine phobias of mice.

Me: Five seconds after that he screamed “oh my god, a keyboar...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

red hot chili peppers joke (original)

So Anthony Kiedis is hanging out at Flea's house. Flea says he's having trouble hooking up his VCR to his TV and he asks Anthony to take a look at it, to see if he can find the problem.

Anthony gets up and takes a look behind the TV at the wires and cables and whatnot.

"I think the pr...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.