Homecoming Jokes

A somewhat socially awkward lad asked a girl he liked to the homecoming dance, and she said yes.

The boy asked his dad for advice, and his dad gave him several tips: get her a nice corsage that matches your boutonniere, show up 10 minutes early to pick her up and speak pleasantly and respect... read more

I was at my homecoming dance when I noticed a kid in the corner looking miserable. Feeling bad, I went over there and asked him what was wrong? He responded that no one would ever want to dance with him because of his wooden eye.

Upon hearing this, I made it my mission to find the boy a d... read more

There is terrible accident in ISS, leaving only one American astronaut alive. All the communications are dead, but he has lots of food, water and oxygen to survive. Finally after two years he is able manufacture escape pod and lands in rural Texas.


He makes his way to closest town and ent... read more

Uncle Ben.

The first says that she couldn't be happier. She married a man who owns a Mercedes Benz car dealership. They live in a beautiful home, she drives whatever new Mercedes that strikes her fancy, and they are living a life of luxury.

The second mentions that her husband was just a councilman in t... read more

because he had no body to go with

Spiderman 3: Homeless

A man stumbles up the driveway to his house at 6 in the morning, barely able to stand on his feet. He manages to reach the door but finds it locked and then proceeds to knock.

knock, knock, knock....

After a while his wife comes and opens the door, in a less than a pleased mood.
... read more

Because I'm going to be at homecoming.

The homecoming queen is the girl with the most teeth, and the valedictorian is the person who could count them all.

Several minutes pass until the boys start talking to the girls and asking them to dance. One after another the girls get asked to. All but one remains. Nobody has asked her out due to her fake wooden eye that she has.

Then suddenly, one boy realizes her sitting alone and wishes she was havin... read more

(Shouting over the loud bass)"Do you take requests?"
"Sure"
"Please stop"

It was the annual homecoming dance at the local high school gym. Most of the young folk were out on the dance floor but a few young men and women lined the sides of the gym, hoping for a dance partner to ask them out onto the dance floor. After waiting anxiously for quite a while, a rather awkward f... read more

So progressive, in fact, that the football team was bullied by the dungeons and dragons club.

Most of you had the starting varsity quarterback as the homecoming king, but ours was a level 8 Paladin.

Homecoming is coming up soon, and a boy has been meaning to ask his crush to go with him, but has been pushing it back because of fear. He wants to go with her so finally, at the end of the day he builds up the courage to ask her. He approaches her standing in front of her locker and asks her the q... read more