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Hindsight Jokes

I spent over 3 hours making a belt out of herbs, but in hindsight...

it's just a waist of thyme.

They say hindsight is 20/20.

Not tonight, my friends. Tonight, 2020 is in hindsight!

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My wife has been cheating on me and in hindsight I should have seen it coming

For the past couple months we'd barely talked at all. Our jobs had been super stressful and it made things tense. When she'd ask how my day was, I'd tersely reply "it sucked" or "you don't want to know."

When I asked her how her day had been she'd say "They fucked me at work again"

Hindsight is 2020

I guess that's why last year was ass

Hindsight is overrated...

...20/19 was better

Professor X: What’s your superpower?Me: Hindsight Professor X: That’s not going to help us

Me: Yes, I see that now.

If hindsight is 2020

Then that's proof that time travel exists.

A man goes on a date

Friend: 'How did your date go?'

Man: 'I talked too much about my obsession with simplifying fractions'

Friend: 'That wasn't a very good idea'

Man: 'Yeah, well hindsight is 1'

Cheers to hindsight!!

....it's 2020..

Happy new years everyone.

Do you know why I hate hindsight?

It's always 2020.

It's true, hindsight really is 2020

I remember last year like it was yesterday.

PSA: Hindsight is officially out of style

It's sooooo 2020.

Hindsight is 20/20

But Heinzsight is tomato/tamato

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I was watching a show about Ancient Egypt, and they mentioned that there were Seven Sacred Oils that they used to anoint the dead with.

I thought that sounded interesting, so I decided to Google "Seven Sacred Oils of Egypt" and the entire front page of results is about where I can buy the essential oils the Egyptians used, you know mlm shit.

I cannot stress enough how this is not what I was looking for, but in hindsight I p...

I just realized my wife left me because of my obsession with simplifying fractions.

Oh well, hindsight is 1.

I have written a book on Penguins

In hindsight, paper would have been better.

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They say Hindsight is 20/20

must be true, cause so far this year everything looks like ass.

Red flags in relationships are always so obvious in hindsight.

I blame the Doppler effect -- when they're coming right at you they look blue.

Hindsight is 20/20.

Or 8:20 PM, for the civilians out there.

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Worst "joke" I've ever heard.

This is a "joke" told by one of my coworkers Jake. There was me him and 2 other coworkers sitting in the work truck.

Jake: You know how geese always fly in a V?

Me: Yeah

J: Well you know how sometimes the goose in the lead will switch and another goose will fly in the front?
...

In hindsight it’s easy to see that 2012 wouldn’t be the end of the world.

The end of the world had 2020 vision.

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A Jew, Muslim and Christian are in a bar

A Jew, Muslim and Christian are in a bar. They are arguing about which religion is the best at recruiting new followers. In the end they all decide to each go into the woods over the week and find a bear. They are then to try and convert that bear to their religion.
A week goes by and they all me...

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First joke I've ever come up with. So far nobody has laughed

I went to the opticians and they were telling me about revolutionary technology to allow us to see out of different parts such as our arms, nose and even our ass. Intrigued, I asked "when will this technology would be available?" The optician replied "arm and nose is coming in 2019, hindsight is 20...

This year is all about noticing things we should’ve done differently. Should’ve done more to stop the spread of the virus, police brutality, wildfires, climate change...but you know what they say about hindsight...

It’s 2020.

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I was greeted by a genie

He says I have only one wish, so I respond, I want to see out of my ass. Granted, the genie says. That was last week ago, and in hindsight, it was worth it.

My GF gave me a BJ on the drive over to her parents house.

In hindsight, she should have waited until after we dropped them off.

This year we learned something very important: The world really isn't prepared for a global pandemic.

Oh well, at least now we know. Hindsight really is 2020.

A Catholic bishop, a Baptist minister, and a Jewish Rabbi meet in a bar.

The three men sit next to each other and begin talking about life and the aspects of their various faiths. The town they all lived in was in a very heavily forrested area and after a couple of drinks the men have an idea.

Each man puts down a couple hundred bucks and they decide to have a com...

After hours of working on every syllable of this masterpiece, I bring you a haiku I've titled "Truth in hindsight"

The sky is blue

The grass is green

Jetfuel can't melt steel beams

My son was very upset when he found out he was adopted.

In hindsight, "one man's trash is another man's treasure" was probably not the best way to start that conversation.

William Shatner, alias Captain Kirk, has discontinued his ladies underwear line...

In hindsight "Shatner Panties" wasn't a good choice of name in the first place.

We should have known communism would fail

In hindsight there were a lot of red flags

I can’t wait for New Year’s Day

So we can read all the “hindsight is 2020” jokes.

Next year will be the year we all look back and

see everything so clearly because hindsight is 2020

New superpower

A man applies to be a superhero as a part of the X-Men

When asked what his superpower is, the man replies "Hindsight".

The doctor says "That won't be of any use to us".

The man replies, "Yes, I see that now".

With so many people looking back at what they would have done before the pandemic…

…I guess hindsight really IS 2020

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The bad news is that I slipped and fell while getting out of the shower and I landed on my glasses. The glasses went up my butt.

The good news?

Hindsight is 20-20

I say this next election we learn from our mistakes in the past and try to move forward to a brighter tomorrow. This election vote...

Hindsight 2020

I'm having memory problems, I can only remember things from about two years ago.

Hindsight is 2020.

I used to work in a car wash, but I wasn't very productive.

In hindsight, it probably wasn't the most practical place for a painter.

I wish my vision was as good as it was 2 years ago...

I guess hindsight is 2020

I told my colleague to stay positive…

…which, in hindsight, would be unhelpful considering he has COVID.

I recently read that it's beneficial to your mental well being to share your bed with your pets...

... but in hindsight, I probably should have left them in the aquarium.

My son’s kindergarten teacher was arrested for heroin possession…

In hindsight, the small pupils were a dead giveaway…

"Forget everything you have ever known!..."

In hindsight not a great opener for my speech at the annual Alzheimer's and Dementia conference.

I thought 2020 would have a lot of jokes about vision

in hindsight with everything going on that was the last of their priorities

Saved some money on the gift, though!

I recently received an invitation to a wedding that would have been difficult to attend.

In hindsight, "Maybe next time" probably wasn't the best RSVP.

“what would you say is your greatest strength”

“i have strong hindsight”

“that wont help us much”

“i see that now”

In the early 2000s I predicted a global pandemic would happen in 2018

but hindsight is 2020.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was on the bus the other day when this young attractive woman started to breastfeed her child. An elderly woman got up and protested saying it was the most disgusting thing she'd ever seen and would complain to the bus company...

In hindsight, I really shouldn't have been wanking at the time...

When I met a girl I liked, I used to put all my favorite things about her surrounded by curly braces inside a Javascript file.

I feel bad about it in hindsight. Now I know it's wrong to objectify women.

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My girlfriend accidentally shoved a pair of glasses up my ass...

Now my hindsight is 20/20

For Christmas I got my sister a dog.

In hindsight, I should poked some holes in the box.
.
.
.
Then again, I shouldn’t have wrapped it a week early.

"You shouldn't have opened that box. Just sayin'"

\-Epimetheus, husband to Pandora and god of hindsight, everyday for the rest of eternity

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I shoved a carrot up my ass...

It improved my hindsight and made me realize I shouldn't have done it

A man and his son were talking.

'Dad, what's your favourite superpower?' - Son

'Hindsight' - Man

'But dad, that's not even a power' - Son

'Yes, I see that now' - Man

Overheard this in a restaurant today and it cracked me up.

I recently came into quite a bit of money.

In hindsight, I should have used tissues.

They said we should’ve seen the pandemic coming.

Hindsight is 2020

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I dumped my girlfriend last week because she had really bad breath.

With hindsight though I'm really missing those 10 blowjobs a day.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If 2020 is perfect vision, how come no one saw this shit coming?

You need to wait until 2021. Hindsight is 2020.

I was at this girls house and we were having a particularly zesty session on her kitchen table. She heard a noise out front and she says, "Oh no! It's my husband! Quick, the back door!!"

In hindsight, I should've ran, but you don't get an offer like that every day.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A joke I made up that's funny only when you look back at it.

This guy shows up to his optometrist and says "I have a weird problem",



The Optometrists replies, "What seems to be the trouble?"



The guys says, "Everything's blurry. My vision is horrible!"



"That's pretty common", the Optometrist replies. "We can certai...

Remember before the New Year were were all worried about the dumb jokes that came with it?

Well hindsight is 2020

I read my part aloud in the church sermon about the crucifixion of Jesus. I was really proud of myself for not making any mistakes.

In hindsight, yelling out "NAILED IT" probably wasn't the best way to celebrate.

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