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A recent symphony performance

During a recent performance of Beethoven's 9th symphony, the two bass violin players become bored because there is a long period where they have nothing to do. One invites the other to go across the alley to a bar. One drink leads to another. Finally one says they need to get back, but the other say...

My secretary called this morning and said she cant work anymore because she lost her eye. After assuring her that was understandable, I asked her to send me her resignation in writing for HR purposes.

"Dear Smon,

The past year has been terrfc, but t s my sncere regret to nform you today wll be my last day wth the organsaton ... "

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Jack the Ripper's reasons for killing hookers was pretty understandable.

They wouldn't accept him into their ranks as Jack the Stripper.

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