The Greeks invented the threesome

But it was the Romans who thought of adding women.

I'm currently studying the Ancient Greeks.

I'm sitting in an elderly home at Athens.

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An old Greek man and an old Italian man are arguing. The Greek man says "Look, all I'm saying is that the Greeks invented everything the Romans get credit for!"

The Italian says "Yes, may be, but the Romans improved it and made it useful!"

The Greek man says "We invented the Democracy!"

The Italian says "We realized the challenge of direct elections and the benefit of the legislature, and thus created the Republic!"

The Greek man says "...

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A Greek and an Indian are having tea together and trying to one up each other on their historical achievements.

The Greek guy says, "Well, we have the Parthenon".

Arching his eyebrows the Indian replies, "We have the Taj Mahal.โ€

The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics."

The Indian, shaking his head, says, "But we invented the number 0.โ€

And so on and on th...

How do the Greeks separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar.

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What is the similarity between Ancient Greeks and Hitler?

They were both fucking assholes.

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Ancient Greeks invented sex

And Romans made it fun by adding women into it.....

Until the British came...eh...arrived.

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Before the invention of lube, Greeks used olive oil to have anal sex.

I guess you might say the people of ancient Greece loved that ancient grease.

"So I matched with this cute guy on Tinder last night, and we started chatting and sending each other memes and little animations. But then he mentioned that he was an exchange student from Athens, so I ghosted him." "Why?"

"My daddy always told me, 'Beware the Greeks bearing gifs.'"

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The Greeks vs. The Italians

The Greeks say, โ€œWe have the Parthenon.โ€

The Italians say, โ€œWe have the Coliseum.โ€

The Greeks say, โ€œWe had great mathematicians and philosophers.โ€

The Italians say, โ€œWe created a world empire and established Pax Romana.โ€

And so on and so on for hours, until final...

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In 450 BC a Greek and a Roman are sitting around, discussing who has more reason to be proud of their heritage

Roman: We are clearly the superior society, after all, we invented aqueducts so cities and fields alike could grow

Greek: Perhaps, but we invented the water mill for grinding abundant grain, so that it could be stored and feed the people. Plus, we developed cartography, mapping out the world....

How many Greeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Olive them.

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An Italian and a Greek get in a fight over sex

Greek: the Greeks invented sex centuries before the Italians!

Italians: maybe so but we improved on it by introducing it to women!

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