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Greeks invented sex

The italians added women to it

What did the Greeks say after Constantinople was taken by the Turks?

What a load of Istanbull

greeks

So, a Greek guy walks into a tailor’s shop with a pair of trousers that were torn.

The tailor looks at them and asks, “Euripides?”

The man nods and asks, “Eumenides?”

The Greeks invented the threesome

But it was the Romans who thought of adding women.

How did ancient Greeks keep tabs on their infants while they slept at night?

They used a baby minotaur.

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A Greek and an Italian were sitting in a coffee shop one afternoon discussing who had the superior culture.

The Greek says, "Well, we have the Parthenon."

Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum."

The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to philosophy.

The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the Roman Empire."

And so on and so on until the G...

Did you know that ancient Greeks would shave their heads before the Olympics to run faster?

Modern historians call it balderdash.

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An old Greek man and an old Italian man are arguing. The Greek man says "Look, all I'm saying is that the Greeks invented everything the Romans get credit for!"

The Italian says "Yes, may be, but the Romans improved it and made it useful!"

The Greek man says "We invented the Democracy!"

The Italian says "We realized the challenge of direct elections and the benefit of the legislature, and thus created the Republic!"

The Greek man says "...

I'm currently studying the Ancient Greeks.

I'm sitting in an elderly home at Athens.

How do the Greeks separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar.

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What is the similarity between Ancient Greeks and Hitler?

They were both fucking assholes.

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The Greeks vs. The Italians

The Greeks say, “We have the Parthenon.”

The Italians say, “We have the Coliseum.”

The Greeks say, “We had great mathematicians and philosophers.”

The Italians say, “We created a world empire and established Pax Romana.”

And so on and so on for hours, until final...

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Before the invention of lube, Greeks used olive oil to have anal sex.

I guess you might say the people of ancient Greece loved that ancient grease.

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In 450 BC a Greek and a Roman are sitting around, discussing who has more reason to be proud of their heritage

Roman: We are clearly the superior society, after all, we invented aqueducts so cities and fields alike could grow

Greek: Perhaps, but we invented the water mill for grinding abundant grain, so that it could be stored and feed the people. Plus, we developed cartography, mapping out the world....

How many Greeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Olive them.

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An Italian and a Greek get in a fight over sex

Greek: the Greeks invented sex centuries before the Italians!

Italians: maybe so but we improved on it by introducing it to women!

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