UPJOKE
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Don't be fooled.

Warning to all women about buying a Christmas present for their husband on eBay.

If you buy stuff on line, be sure to check out the seller carefully.

I just spent $95 + postage,

on a penis enlarger for my husband's small one.

Bastards sent me a magnifying glass.

Th...

My dad fooled me

We had a cable tie that didn't work it wouldn't lock, so he told me to get another one and Test it first. I did...... And due to the test it now was no longer any good as we coudlnt use it he just laughed a lot and said get another one

What did the first person to get "April Fooled" say?

Jesus! I thought you were dead!

I've once fooled an entire class filled with future Doctors, Lawyers, and scientists...

Of course they were all in Kindergarten so it wasn't hard

Fool or be fooled

A greedy guy was walking and passed by a hospital and there was a sign that says "pay 100$ for a treatment and if we couldn't treat you we give you 200$ back"

So he decided to fool them and get extra money so he goes in and says to the docter i lost my taste buds and the doctor calls his as...

One day, Pete complained to his friend, “My head really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor.”

His friend said, “Don’t do that. There’s a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply tell it the problem, put in a sample of your urine, and the computer will diagnose it and tell you what you can do about the issue you’re having. It only costs $...

3 mathematicians and 3 physicists want to go on a train ride

The physicists buy 3 tickets(one for each) and the mathematicians say they have a special method and buy 1 ticket(1 for the 3 of them)

On the train the mathematicians lock up in the same toilet and when the conductor knocked and asked for the ticket, one mathematician put his hand out with t...

A boy selling newspapers on the street

Keeps walking around the streets with newspapers while waving one around and shouting: Mass fraud! Mass fraud! One hundred people have been fooled! Mass fraud! One hundred people have been fooled!

One guy quickly runs to the boy and buys a newspaper. as soon as he has it in his hand he starts...

Costco Doctor

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, John says to Scott, “My elbow hurts like hell.

I guess I'd better see a doctor."

“Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Scott replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine sample and the computer ...

As a lumberjack starts his chainsaw he hears the tree begin to cry. “Please don’t cut me down!” The tree pleads, “I’ll do anything!” The lumberjack says, “Fine! If you can solve this impossible riddle that has fooled some of the greatest minds from doctors, writers to philosophers, I’ll spare you.”

The tree was stumped.

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