Fetish Jokes - 80 Hilarious Fetish Jokes

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() I have a fetish for intellectual breakthroughs

I struggled for a while, but then I came to a realization

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I have to tell my girlfriend I am not into her fetishes.

But first, I gotta get some off my chest.

I've just discovered that I have a logic fetish.

I can't stop coming to conclusions.

I once knew a girl with a fetish for synnesthesia.

Eventually, she came to her senses.

My girlfriend left me because I have a fetish for touching pasta.

I'm feeling cannelloni now. 😔

(Thanks for the silver! X 😊😊)

I’ve developed a fetish for figuring things out.

I just came to that realization.

My girlfriend has a fetish for LEGO

If you build it, she will come

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A wife was cleaning their 12-year-old son’s bedroom. When she found a load of serious gear and fetish mags, she asked her husband, “what do we do?”

The husband said, “I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t spank him.”

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My girlfriend has a poop fetish

I always give her for it

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Over the past year, my fetishes have been slowly getting more perverse.

But it wasn't until I spanked a statue that I realised I'd hit rock bottom.

A pee fetish isn't something you do half-hearted.

Either urine or you're out.

I recently found out my mom has a disturbing fetish. She has slept with several underage teenagers and I am really concerned about their well being.

The victims contacted me while playing CoD.

What kind of candy do you offer a woman with a ?

Mentos

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My ex-girlfriend had this weird fetish

She liked to dress up like herself and act like a raging all the time

My overly curious neighbor has a peculiar fetish...

... he's always poking his nose into other peoples business.

I never thought I'd have a fetish for collecting data on people.

But then I came to my census

I think my girlfriend has a trigonometry fetish

because every time I talk to her she gets off on a tangent.

Why do people with foot fetishes never win?

Because they like the taste of defeat

Why won't Americans switch to the metric system?

They have a

I think I have a fetish for the last paragraph of an essay. How do I know?

I just came to that conclusion.

If a man with a cheats on his wife...

Does that mean he got off on the wrong foot?

You know what they say about people with an architecture fetish…

Build it and they will come

I've got a fetish for geometry.

Sorry, I'm getting off on a tangent right now.

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How does someone with a poop fetish meet new people?

They slide into their BMs.

My furry friend told me his strange fetish of being vored by a squirrel.

Told him he's gotta be nuts

I have a ...

I have tried using meters but it just doesn't work for me.

I have a fetish for magnets

I don't know why, I just find them attractive.

What do you call an ape with a fetish?

Kink Kong.

My wife begged me not to tell anyone about her .

Well I’ve only gone and put my foot in it.

I used to have a weird fetish surrounding my abilities to see, touch, hear, smell and feel

I came to my senses

What do you call a guy with a plant fetish?

A Weed Whacker.

Which chemical element could be someones comic book fetish?

Manganese.

Did you hear about the guy who decided to explore his sadness fetish?

A decision he would come to regret

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I'm embarrassed by my donkey fetish

Sometimes it makes me feel like an .

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There was a couple who explored but they finally decided they liked “oral” more than “.”

They were “head over heels” in love.

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Did you hear about the guy with a fruit fetish?

He's bananas.

I was once accused of having a …

…but that’s a lie. I much prefer the Metric system.

What was the jazz singer’s fetish?

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I've invented the ultimate toy, the Fetish-o-matic 3000!

Not quite ready for mass production though, still working out the kinks.

I met someone online who shares my fetish for urinating on dried fruit...

Next week we're going to go on a date

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Two men with a feather fetish

Two strangers, and Englishman and a Scotsman, are sitting at a bar chatting. They've both had a few drinks, so the conversation gets a bit more personal. It turns out they both have the same strange fetish—tickling a woman's with a feather. The Scotsman says, "Aye, ah luv it, but ah can never fi...

Did you hear about the lawyer who was prosecuted for having a loophole fetish?

He got off on a technicality.

I have been inventing a new fetish, however...

I still haven't worked out the **Kinks**!

You know what they call a in Paris?

They got the metric system, they wouldn't know what the hell a foot is.

Why did the guy with a want to lose?

He loves defeat.

Yesterday i found out that i got a

Because i like Mentos

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Therapist: Have you gotten over your fetish of being starched, pressed, and folded?

Me: We’re still ironing out the kinks

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I finally finished that book about clock fetishes

It's about time.

My girlfriend has such a neck fetish,

she barely cares about me she just likes my neck. She's a necromancer.

My GF told me my isn't because I love her feet

It's because my first crush was my sock

What is 007's fetish?

...

What’s is a ruler’s favorite fetish

Foot

Should I do something about my fetish for infrastructure?

Or should I just cross that bridge when I come to it?

I used to be embarrassed by my geology fetish.

I started off stroking gravel but now I'm feeling a little boulder.

I couldn’t believe when my girlfriend said that she has an abduction fetish.

But she demands to be taken, seriously!

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The Romans had an unusual fetish for Jesus

One time, they even nailed him on a cross.

What do you call an Alabamian With a Gluten Fetish?

In Bread.

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What do you call someone with a fetish for underwater projectiles?

A torpedophile!

Why did the fetish art meme get removed?

Because I didn’t credit one of the artists. I didn’t want to give them any foot traffic.

I have a dyslexia fetish

It makes my spine stiff

Did you hear about the guy with a who would intentionally lose?

He loved the smell of da feet!

I have a fetish for doing algebra

I’ve come to terms with that

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My friend confessed his fetish for putting his in coconut

He's nuts

I want to open a Star Wars themed cafe that caters to people who are obsessed with bubble tea.

I am going to call it Boba Fetish.

What do non-Americans call someone with a ?

A meter maniac..

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They finally released the film about men with a clock fetish

It's about time

I have a Blair Witch fetish....

I want my buddy to stand in the corner and not watch.

Happy Halloween!

I think my girlfriend has a blind fetish.

Last night she said we should stop seeing each other.

Her: I have kink-shaming fetish

Me: That's messed up

Her: (moans softly)

What do creeps eat at an Italian restaurant ?

Fetish-ini Alfredo

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I have a trash can fetish

My wet dreams are garbage

Fetish Acceptance

Now that's a movement I can get behind.

I knew a Guy who had a Fetish for Studio Audiences

He Came with a Laugh Tack.

"That's an odd fetish"

I said to myself, as I came to a fork in the road

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I asked my girlfriend to dress up as a Doctor during

To satisfy my fetish of being able to afford medicare.

Subway stops are kind of my fetish.

It's just how I get off.

Your fetishes are nothing to be ashamed about.

Unless your fetish is being humiliated, then you should be very ashamed, you nasty little pervert.

A wife tells her husband that she's discovered his secret fetish via his search history...

"It was a weird one for sure," she says, "but I think I can make it work without being too embarrassed, as long as you don't film it." He accepts.

Later that night, he asks her if she wants to try it. She smiles, begins to undress, and goes "SKIPPITY BEE BOP BEE BOP DUP-A DUAAA"

I hope Donald Trump has a .

He has to get used to the taste of defeet.

What's a British spy's secret fetish?

, James

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