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Felix Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two guys meet at a bar. one of them is an inventor.

Bob,the inventor,tosses Felix a peach."What's this?"Felix asks.

"It's a peach."says Bob.

"I know it's a peach." Felix says.

"It's a special peach"Bob says.

"What's so special about it?"continues Felix.

"This one here,I shit you not, tastes just like a woman's vagin...

Frank and Fiona Lames were very upstanding citizens.

They worked very normal 9-5s, were involved in the community, and cheered for [insert reader’s favorite sports team].


The lovely couple had two teenage children: Felicity and Felix. The two youngsters were nothing like their parents. They went were pranksters and miscreants, always getti...

New Job.......

Barry is seated at a small table in a warmly lit coffee shop sipping coffee.
Barry’s friend Felix enters looking somewhat dubious. (Felix bares a remarkable resemblance to Woody Allen.) He spots Barry and joins him at the table.
BARRY: Did you find a job?
FELIX: Yeah. I got a job at a...

"honey don't you think you're treating one of our kids unfairly?"

"who? Tim, Felix or the fat one?"

How would the Church of England deal with the statement that "the cat sat on the mat" if it appeared in the Bible?

The liberal theologians would point out that such a passage did not of course mean that the cat literally sat on the mat. Also, cat and mat had different meanings in those days from today, and anyway, the text should be interpreted according to the customs and practices of the period.

This ...

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