Mailbox Jokes - 61 Hilarious Mailbox Jokes

I saw my neighbour going outside again and again to check his mailbox.

When I asked why is he doing that, he replied - My computer says I have got mail.

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Joe rented an apartment and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox

While there, an attractive young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes wearing a robe.

Joe smiled at the young woman and she started a conversation with him. As they talked, her robe slipped open, and it was obvious that she had nothing else on. Poor Joe broke out into a sweat...

What word means the same thing with several letters added?

Mailbox

A mailman notices a mailbox with the flag up

So, he opens the box and picks up a letter. He glances at it briefly to make sure it is stamped, and then puts it in his bag with his other letters. When he gets back to his office, the letter goes in a big bin with all of the other out-going mail. He thinks nothing of it, and finishes his day.
<...

Just found an envelope containing several severed fingers in my mailbox

It was weird because we don't usually get mail on Sundays

I like my jokes like I like my broken mailboxes.

Promptly reposted and hopefully nobody notices.

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A mail carrier is about to retire…

So he puts a note in all of his mailboxes letting people know that his last day would be at the end of the week.

On his last day, neighbors were showering him with gifts and praise for his many years of faithful service.

As he approaches a house in his route, he realizes that he’s ne...

A doctor and a lawyer

During a party, a doctor is telling a lawyer that he is sick of his friends asking him for free medical advice. The lawyer says, "just do what I do, and leave a bill in their mailbox." The doctor decides he'll give that a try and thanks his lawyer friend.

When the doctor gets home, he has a ...

It's amazing how removing letters from something changes things so fast

For instance, if you remove enough letters from 'mailbox' you get 'felony'

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A humble farmer goes out to his mailbox, seeing that a letter has arrived.

"Dear Ronald J. Kse,
This year we have chosen you to be the host of this year's harvest reap! All you need to do is provide your humble farm as the place of the party, and we will all provide.
Thanks, your neighbors"
Now, Ronald had really enjoyed last year's party, so he was delighted to b...

My friend asked me when I was going to let him out of the mailbox I'd trapped him in.

I told him I'd keep him posted.

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She did what he said

The retiring mailman

The mailman who had been on the same route for 10 years was leaving the job.

He had made many friends on the route and decided to put a note in their mailboxes informing them.

Many on his route came out of their houses to wish him well and some even gave h...

So my neighbor knocked my mailbox over.

I said to him:"This needs to be reposted."

"Yo mama so stupid that she was yelling into a mailbox"

We ask her what's she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.

A guy is sitting on his porch when his blonde neighbor walks out to her mailbox.

She opens the mailbox, looks in, colses it up and walks back into the house. Five minutes later, she does the same thing. After another five minutes, the same thing, but this time she's visibly angry. She comes out again after another five minutes, looking furious. She looks in the mailbox and slams...

How can you tell if a letter in your mailbox is a boy or a girl?

If it's a bill, it's fee mail.

Do you know the difference between a mailbox and a cow?

If your answer was no, you had better not become a mailman.

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It's Dale's last day as a postman

25 years he's been delivering the mail to the same neighborhood. When it was time to retire, he let everyone know ahead of time, that way if there was an issue with their mail, they new it would be a new letter carrier. As he made his way along his route, he found little going away gifts from some t...

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I caught my neighbors dog taking a shit on my lawn this morning so I put it in his mailbox.

Well, not all of it. Just the legs and tail.

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What is the difference between a cows butt and a mailbox?

Well if you don't know the difference between the two I won't let you mail my letters.

"Have you ever seen a mailbox before?" asked my postman sarcastically.

I said, "Yes. Floyd Mayweather."

A man once got locked inside a mailbox. Everyone rushed for his rescue,

Because he was a priority male.

I was feeling a little naughty, so I decided to run as fast as I could to my mailbox and grab the mail while naked

A mile in to my jog to the post office, the police stopped me.

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A blonde keeps checking her mailbox

A man is mowing his lawn and every 2 minutes, his blonde neighbor leaves the house to check her mailbox, opens it and closes it in frustration

After she repeats this five times, the neighbor asks "Is there something wrong?"

The blonde replies: "No shit something's wrong, my computer ke...

A man asks his friend what the difference is between a mailbox and a hippo's backside.

The friend immediately replies "I don't know."

"Well then I'd be happy to help you mail your letters."

Woman greets mailman at her mailbox, invites him in, they make passionate love, then she makes him a lunch fit for a king and then hands him a $1 bill.

Flabbergasted mailman says: "My goodness that was outstanding, wonderful, thank you, I really appreciate it. May I ask why you did all this for me?"

Woman says: "I told my husband you were retiring and suggested we do something for you and he said "screw the mailman, give him a dollar", the l...

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A mailman was retiring after running the same route over 20 years, he had gotten to know the people pretty well so he left little notes of appreciation in their mailboxes...

The next day he gets to the first house on the block and the couple there greet him with a going away present and say there goodbyes.

This goes on for the next few houses.

But about 5 houses in a lady greets him at the door in nothing but her underwear. She snatches him inside and pro...

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.

Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.

After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"<...

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There is a little boy who wants a bike..

So he goes and asks his mom for a bike to which she replies that maybe if he prays, god will bring him a bike.

So he sits down and writes Jesus a letter .." Dear jesus, if you give me a bike I wont sin for 1 year.."

He walks down to the mailbox but before leaving the house sees his mot...

An old lady asks God for help.

In the highlands of Scotland lives an elderly lady in a house outside a small village. A harsh winter is coming and the lady is very worried she can’t pay the gas bill that winter. With no family left, she turns to God and she decides to write him a letter.

“Dear God,
In your endless merc...

I think this one was here but saw it a few years ago so i decided to post it.

Little Jimmy was once playing with his dinosaur toys on the backyard, when his older brother Tony walked towards him with a brand new baseball bat, ball and glove.

Jimmy noticed it and gasped "Tony, how did you get all those cool toys?!"

"Simple" Tony chuckled "Just go to an adult, and...

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What do you call a person with no arms and no legs...

At your front door? Matt.

Under a pile of leaves? Russell.

In your mailbox? Bill.

Hanging on a wall? Art.

In the middle of the ocean? Fucked. (Also Bob).

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Sex at 73.

I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can have

sex at 73. I'm so happy, because I live at number 71. So it's not too

far to walk home afterwards. And it's the same side of the street.

I don't even have to cross the road!

I want to live in a house that's shaped like a mailbox.

That way people will know that I'm outgoing.

There's A Banana In Your Driveway....

I came up with this recently, more of a riddle than a joke but whatevs.... So there's a banana in your driveway, a pineapple on your front porch, a watermelon in your front yard, and a mango in your mailbox, Now........ what is on your roof?

A Blonde Checks Her Mail

A man was outside mowing his lawn, when the blonde next door came out and looked in her mailbox. She frowned and went back in.
After a few minutes the blonde came back out and looked in her mailbox again. She had the same reaction and then went in once more. The man was a little confused but...

A blonde got a mail.

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive
blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the
mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back
into the house. A little later she came out of her house again,
went to the mailbox and again opened it...

What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox?

... You'd make a terrible Mailman.

Sam was a man with big dreams who lived in a small countryside village

One day, sam decided to follow his dreams and went to the big city. "Now you gotta find a job, Sam" he said to himself, and went to search for one.

After being rejected from several job interviews, Sam returns defeated to his home, there, he decides not to give up. With some money from his pa...

My Favorite Joke.

This joke is slowly dying as people of a certain age pass, so I have to use it quickly:

A hotdog runs down to its mailbox and finds an envelop from Ed McMahon that says, "You may already be a wiener."

This is my first post...and probably my last. Sorry and your welcome.

What do you call a guy/girl with no arms and no legs jokes. (WDYCAGWNAANL)

Ok these are pretty common, so I'll start with a couple of standards and then add some I came up with.

WDYCAGWNAANL in a mailbox? Bill

WDYCAGWNAANL in front of a door? Matt

WDYCAGWNAANL in the water? Bob

WDYCAGWNAANL in a pile of leaves? Russel.

In a hole? Doug....

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Pete writes a letter to Santa the day before Christmas. It says: "Dear Santa, please be so kind and give me 100$, I was a good kid this year and we are very poor".

He posts it and waits patiently. The next day one of tha mailmen opens it and reads the letter. He feels really sorry for the kid knowing he won't get the money.

The postman talks to other colleagues and they feel sorry for the poor kid too. They manage to assemble 50$ only. Although it's not...

The neighborhood postman was retiring after 30 years.

On his last day of delivering mail, all of the people on his route left him something in the mail box in honor of his retirement. Some left money, some left small gifts, and some met him at the door and invited him in for a drink.

As he was putting the mail in the mailbox of the last house, t...

A poor man decides to write a letter to God, asking for some money...

In the letter, he writes that he works very hard but can never make enough. He pleads to God that even $100 would make him extremely happy.

The next day he goes to the post office, hands in his letter, and leaves with high hopes. The person sorting all the mail notices the envelope addressed...

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Farm kid writes letter home after joining Marines....

Dear Ma and Pa:

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m. But I am ge...

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A very poor man

decided his last resort was to write a letter to God. His family was going hungry. He was behind on all of his bills. He became unemployed, and started to grow ill. He wrote "Dear heavenly father. I've no other resources. No other place to turn. I don't ask for much. I really just need $1500 to catc...

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A man is driving a car through the woods...

Suddenly, he stumbles upon a frog and he immidiately stops. He leaves his car, and the frog thanks him for stopping and offers him 3 wishes. The man is confused, but eventually he has these 3 wishes:

1. I want a huge house
2. I want a basement full of money
3. I want 2 women in every ro...

Guy gets a job as a spy...

He's sent on his first mission, and told that the secret passphrase he has to give to contacts is, "The night-bird flies at dawn."

He's instructed to go to London, head to Piccadilly Circus, and speak to a guy in a purple fedora, busking. So he flies to London, goes to Piccadilly Circus, fin...

The mail gets delivered and...

The mail gets delivered and this busy Mom sees that she has been given mail for her neighbor. She scoops up her baby and goes out to deliver it to the correct house. She walks a couple houses down and pops the mail into the mailbox. Almost immediately her baby starts making a sound like a tuning for...

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One day John looks over the fence and spies Sam's wife, naked, watering the garden.

When Sam gets home from work, John brags to him that he's seen his wife naked.

Sam wants revenge, so that night creeps over to John's yard and catches sight of John's wife performing oral sex.

The next day, Sam approaches John at the mailbox. "Hey, I saw your wife performing ...

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An little orphan boy writes a letter to santa on christmas

"Dear santa,
I have no money this Christmas for any toys. please send me $100 so I can buy something" He takes the letter, addresses it to Santa Claus North Pole and drops it in the mailbox. At the post office, while sifting through mail, they ran into the boys letter and they opened it. Touched...

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Voodoo Dildo

There's this older, very wealthy fellow. Of course, being very wealthy, he snagged himself a younger and smoking hot wife. Well today he accepted he can't have sex anymore because viagra has ceased to work with him, so he goes to the adult shop to get his wife a toy instead.

He walks up to th...

Drunk driver

This isn't so much a joke as it is a true story that happened to me. My buddy always got a kick out of it and it makes me laugh. Delete if not allowed.

My friends wife left him and I went to his house to drink beer and play music. We had a great time and somewhere around 3am I st...

Two troublesome boys

So these two kids are just the worst. They're 8 and 6, and they get into trouble every day. Kicking cats, firecrackers in mailboxes, the works. If something is broken or missing in their neighborhood, it's these kids' fault.

Their parents are at their wits end; they've tried grounding th...

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Little Red Riding Hood is traveling to her grandmother's house...

... as she went skipping through the woods, she saw a big bad wolf hiding behind a tree, she yelled, "hey big bad wolf, I see you there!". The wolf ran away.

A little while later, she was skipping across the bridge crossing the river, and she saw a big bad wolf hiding under the bridge, she ye...

Two American communists decide they would like to emigrate to the Soviet Union.

The two men, names Ron and John, did not trust the negative things they had heard about the USSR in the press, since they believed that was just capitalist propaganda meant to discredit communism. However, just to be sure, the men formulated a plan to investigate what the country was like personally...

A blonde in her Corvette convertible passes a policeman at high speed.

He immediately flips on his lights and gives chase. She careens at a corner and knocks over a mailbox, then jumps the sidewalk sending pedestrians scrambling for safety. She gets back onto the road and approaches a red light with traffic stopped, but swerves into the opposite lane crossing the doubl...

A doctor and a lawyer are at a party...

People at the party keep coming up to the doctor and asking him for medical advice. The doctor gets aggravated that he cannot enjoy the party because of the constant medical questions. He notices that his lawyer friend is sitting peacefully in a corner and hasn't been disturbed all night.

The...

The Genie With a Price

One day as he was walking on the beach, a man found a golden lamp.

He opened it and a large blue genie emerged from the bottle.

"You have 3 wishes, but whatever you wish for, your ex-wife will get double."

The man immediately wishes for 3 million dollars. He goes home to find...

One day, Keanu Reeves is leaving his house...

On his way out, his home is surrounded by paparazzi. Looking into the crowds, he sees 20 people or so, and standing in between all of them, is a rather large machine. He hides his face and quickly rushes to his car.

Keanu, knowing how to elude the paparazzi where possible, drives a rather ro...

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Four dads go out to dinner...

After they order, one dad gets up and announces that he's going to the restroom and will be right back. Once he leaves, things are kind of awkward, so one dad breaks the tension.

"I just have to say, my son is the greatest thing I could've asked for. He started out as a table cleaner at a cha...

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