Decreases Jokes - 7 Hilarious Decreases Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What food decreases sex drive more than any other?

Wedding cake.

Don't drink water while studying...

Why?

Because chemistry says that concentration decreases while adding water.

Note: My first attempt. Thanks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Appointment

I travel for work, and it sometimes decreases how often we get to have “sexy time.” I knew that I’d have to leave today, so last night when we went to bed I was all riled up and went over to kiss my wife. She said “honey you know I can’t, I have a gynecologist appointment tomorrow!” And I thought “...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dave walked into the office, starting his lines with: "Hey guys, I had a weird dream last night"

"God himself asked if I want to improve my memory, but my dick size decreases, or the other way around, to-"

This is where I had to stop him.

"Dave, stop. You told us this story yesterday"

So I hear that the Euro is destabilizing and deflating...

...if its value decreases any more, Europe might have to switch back to their old international currency, Czechoslovakia.

There was a man who swore he was getting smaller.

[spoilers](#s) Everyday, his height decreases by an inch. Alarmed, he visits the doctor immediately, and asks the secretary to squeeze him in.

"Surely, sir. The doctor will be here any minute. You just have to sit down and be a little patient."

Job descriptions

Lawyer: who writes a 15,000 word document and calls it a "brief."

Accountant: who knows the cost of everything and the value of nothing.

Auditor: who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.

Banker: who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it ba...

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