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What religion is your bra??

A man walked into then ladies department and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said,
“I'd like to buy a bra for my wife.”

'”What type of bra?”, asked the clerk.
“Type?”, inquires the man, “There's more than one type?”

“Look around”, said the saleslady, as she sh...

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A lady goes into hospital for labia reduction surgery...

When she wakes up she finds three cards on her bedside table. The first card is from her the surgeon and says "the surgery was a complete success, get well soon" she says to herself "how nice." The second card is from her husband and says "glad the surgery was a success, love you and get well soon. ...

Breast reduction surgery clinic motto:

When life gives you melons, make life take the melons back!

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Did you hear about Brad Pitt's buttocks reduction surgery?

Now he's a bottomless pitt.

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Another stutterer

A guy with a terrible stutter goes to the doctor. Doctor examines him, and says, "I'm afraid the problem is your large penis. It requires such an enormous blood supply, not enough blood is reaching the speech center in your brain."

"W-w-well, what c-c-can I d-d-do?" asks the guy.

"We c...

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A college advertising lecture is taking place. The speaker is presenting his anti-drug PSA.

He says:

- I am the author of a simple, yet effective campaign against drug use.

He shows the poster he designed. It shows two circles, one big and the other small. The big one is titled "This Is Your Brain", the small one is titled "This Is Your Brain on Drugs". The speaker says:
<...

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A woman was at the doctors enquiring whether it was possible so to get a vaginal reduction

After multiple tests and doctors visits she found that she was eligible for the procedure.

After she woke up form the anaesthetic she found three beatuiful bouquets for flowers by her bed side.

One from her surgeon, saying that everything had gone smoothly and her recovery should only...

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Have you ever wondered why letters are used to define bra sizes?

{A} Almost Boobs.
{B} Barely there.
{C} Can't Complain.
{D} Dang!
{DD} Double dang!
{E} Enormous!
{F} Fake.
{G} Get a Reduction.
{H} Help me, I've fallen
and I can't get up!

Weight loss

A guy learns about a new workout method - rapid weight reduction guaranteed. He calls the company, they make an appointment for the standard package .

At the given time it knocks on his door. He opens and there is this really nice girl in a tight running outfit - she winks at him and says- ...

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Man couldnt stop shouting.

Every good morning, every conversation, every single word. The man just could not stop shouting.

So one day, he and his wife decide to see a doctor about it. "IDUNNO, DOC. I JUST CAN'T SEEM TO LOWER MY VOICE NO MATTER WHAT I DO. IS THERE ANYTHING YOU CAN DO FOR ME?".

The doctor says, "...

Tried to increase the "black noise reduction" on my PS3

But Chris Tucker is still yelling at me

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I underwent surgery and now I've got a ten inch cock.

I think I'm going to need another reduction.

An old forest ranger is retiring.

At his retirement party he tells his successor, "Jerry, whatever you do, don't fire Hugh Williams".
Well Jerry doesn't really like being told what to do, especially by some guy on his way out the door, but he assures the old ranger he won't fire him.
A few years pass without incident, but as ...

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A 50 year-old woman decides to spend a lot of money on her birthday...

...on cosmetics, wrinkle reduction treatments, a new hairdo, new clothes, etc. When she decides she's done the most she could, she feels really good about herself and decides to go for a walk.

First, she enters a shop to buy a magazine. While she's paying, she asks the cashier:

'How ol...

Tax.

Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to £100...
If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this...

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay £1.
The sixth would pay £3.
The se...

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There's a man with a 15 inch penis...

This is a problem so he goes to the doctor to see what he can do about size reduction. The doctor says "sir, I can't do anything about it here. But I do know of a magic frog. Go into the woods, find the frog and ask it to marry you. Every time it says no, your penis will decrease by 3 inches."
<...

As I looked at the liposuction tube I realized it could be used to strangle someone...

...making it a weapon of mass reduction.

Gujarati needs plastic surgery

One gujarati 'fell down the stairs' and broke his face. Doctors said he needed to get plastic surgery. So he goes to plastic surgeon.

"How much?" he asks the doctor.

The doctor takes one look at his face and says "2 million"

"Oh no, that is too high. I have mouths to feed, si...

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How to break bad news like a boss

At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Senor Kent? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house."

"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"

"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Kent, that your parrot, he is dead".

"My parrot? Dead? The one that w...

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A man goes to the doctor

A man goes to his doctor and says "*Doc, I've always had this really high pitched voice, I don't know why, but I think it's the reason I'm not taken seriously at work, can you help me*"
The doctor tells him he can help if he can determine the cause, and he'll have to give him a physical. ...

Any good chemistry jokes?

A ketone and a primary amine walk into a bar and yell "Let's get Schiff based!"

Why couldn't the hemiacetal maintain a healthy relationship with his family?
He wasn't very stable and was never seen without alcohol.

An organic chemist wanted to reduce a ketone, but not the ...

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