How far is it from the Earth to the sun?

8 CVS receipts

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dick is like my CVS receipt...

...full of STD meds.

I went to CVS to get toilet paper and they ran out because of the virus.

So I bought a candy bar and the receipt gave me enough to last for weeks.

Since starting the quarantine two weeks ago, I’ve been shredding all my old CVS receipts. I’m about halfway done...

...with the first one.

What was left in CVS after the Detroit riots?

Condoms and father day cards.

Did you hear the CVS receipt joke?

Sit down and get comfy. It’s really long.

True Story: My wife took my 15 year old daughter to get her 1st...

Pfizer vaccination on Friday night at a local CVS. The place was packed and there was an older couple there thanking everyone for getting vaccinated. When my wife and daughter got home they were telling me about how packed it was. My daughter mentioned the older couple and said that when they tha...

What do you do after you buy something at CVS?

Use the receipt as a trashy scarf.

A friend went to the CVS in Baltimore after the looting to pick up some items,

the only things left behind were sun tan lotion and father's day cards.

My CVS receipt was so long, I could tie it around my waist...

It was a waist of paper.

Good thing I had a CVS receipt in my wallet...

The men’s room was out of toilet paper.

So a man walks in to a CVS..

and he goes to the female cashier and asks how he can know what size condom he should wear. She tells him to step behind the counter, she unzips his pants, gives him a few tugs and says "Medium". He buys his condoms and tells his buddy "Hey, there's this girl at the CVS who can guess your condom siz...

Why are CVS and Walgreens usually on the corners?

Because drug dealers usually prefer corners.

When I'm a hiring manager and I receive a pile of CVs

I throw half of the pile in the trash. I don't want unlucky people working in my department.

Why is KKR trying to buy Walgreens?

They tried to buy CVS but then receipt would be too long.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to his doctor with a sore arm.

He sits down on the exam table and the doctor looks at his arm.
"What seems to be the trouble today, Mr. Wainscotting?", the doctor asks.
"Doc, I've got terrible pain starting in my bicep and extending down to my forearm." replies Mr. Wainscotting.
"Let's have a look."
The doctor examine...

I found a way to save 27 million tons of paper per year

I signed up for e-mail receipts at CVS

THE SMALL BROWN BOTTLE

The other day I went over to a nearby CVS Pharmacy. When I got there, I went straight to the back of the store to where the Pharmacists’ Counter is located.
I took out my little brown bottle along with a teaspoon and laid them both onto the counter.
...

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