Why should you never tell a drug addict a joke?

They might crack up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did one bum cheek say to the other bum cheek?

Whenever we get together we have a crack up.

Why are eggs not very much into jokes

Its because they could crack up

An old guy with a horrible toupee stopped me in the parking lot to tell me this random joke...made me crack up.

How do you get down from an elephant??


YOU DON'T! You get down from a goose!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The 5 Penny Joke

I have 5 pennies. I lay one on a table.

"Smell anything?"
I point to the penny.
"There's a cent."

I lay a second penny down.
"See any fruit?"
"There's a pair."

Third penny.
"See any cops?"
"There's three coppers right there."

4th.
"See any cars?"...

Unreceived Mail

A man was pleased to see that the local newspaper was once again hosting it's annual joke contest. Readers from all around the local area would send in jokes, with the top 5 published.

The rules of the competition were simple, all jokes had to be original and had to be written by the sender.<...

Why do iPhone have a great sense of humor?

Because they crack up easily.

Wanna hear a joke about eggs?

Nah, you'll crack up because my yolks, are egg-celent. Note: I've told this joke at least 12 dozen times

An egg was on stage

He was telling lots of eggcelent yolks that made the crowd crack up

Why didn't the rooster tell Dad Jokes?

He was afraid his kids would crack up!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Anybody who bothered to look could have seen the signs. Speed had done it's work on the road and it was starting to crack up - didn't know if it was coming or going. The chicken knew that. The chicken knew that road had always been a little slippery. Sure it started out with bright, clear lines and ...

I'd like to think I'm a fairly funny guy.

I mean I get mirrors to crack up without any effort. Just natural talent I guess

A blond, brunette, and redhead get in a car accident.

A blond, brunette, and redhead get in a car accident. They all die and go to heaven. At the gates of heaven, they are met by a man who tells them that there is very little room there. He says that he will tell them 100 jokes, each progressively funnier than the next. Whoever can listen to all of the...

I heard this pitiful joke when I was a teen.

Confucius say, woman who fly upside down have crack up.

I read the punch line first so I don't waste time on jokes I already know

I know I'm not the only one who does this.

Some of these jokes ought to have their own subreddits.

A group of trapped miners is finally freed after 188 days trapped underground. The media is all over the story, and the miners are immediately put in front of bright lights, cameras and...

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